Author, What Women Fear(2012)
MA, Developmental Psychology, Vanderbilt University
Women of Faith speaker
Children: Abby, Ellie, Kate and Charlotte
Angie Smith: What Women Fear
The 700 Club
CBN.com -THE CONCEPT OF FEAR
Angie says she had a haunting feeling of fear which she carried with her into adulthood. She recalls being 3 years old when she started worrying about things that children shouldn’t be worried about. Once Angie recalls that she was hysterical that her baby sister would stop breathing and die. “I made my dad take me into her room to be sure she was breathing,” says Angie. “My parents did everything they could, but to this day, fear is a major part of my testimony,” says Angie. Over the years, some people told Angie that if she were a good Christian she wouldn’t be experiencing fear in her life. In actuality, Angie believes when women don’t express their real fears, the enemy thrives on that silence. She says the devil doesn’t want us to share our heart and seek wisdom on how to live lives that glorify God in spite of the darkness that we feel. “What’s really important is that you can love God and struggle with fear,” says Angie. “We think God can’t handle our fear.”
She says some of the fears women face are fears of rejection, abandonment, betrayal, being found out, failure, death, not being significant, your past catching up with you, God’s plan for your life, God not being real and God. She reminds us that the first question in the Bible was asked by Satan in the garden and that the enemy doesn’t have to force us to do anything sinful, he merely plants a seed of doubt and lets us tangle ourselves up in it. Though we all act out of fear in our own ways, the heart of it is the same. “Every single fear comes from the lie spoken by the enemy: Are you sure? God says He is good, is He?He tells you He has your best in mind, does He?, says Angie. She encourages others to change their thinking about fear. Instead of it being black and white, she says it’s more of a balancing act. “I don’t think I’m a failure because I have had fears,” says Angie. “I find that every day I have to adjust my footing consciously to move toward Jesus.”
Todd and Angie were married in 2001. In January 2008, Angie was pregnant with their fourth daughter. Instead of being told the ultrasound was normal, Todd and Angie found out that their daughter would not survive long after birth. In the months that followed, Todd and Angie prepared for Audrey’s burial. On April 7, 2008, Audrey was born. She lived for two and a half hours. “She showed me a place in my heart I had never seen before,” says Angie. “When she went to be with the Lord, there was no fear in the room…..I held her body long after she was gone and I stared into the depths of my greatest fear.” A month later, Angie got a call in the middle of the night that her three-month old nephew died of SIDS. Angie says she trusted God with her life, but at this point, she did a much better job believing it for other people than she did for herself. “The thing I had dreaded for years was a reality. There were two people I loved buried deep within the earth….never to be held here again,” she says.
“I felt like a failure as a Christian,” Angie says. “But I think it’s natural to fear death.” She says we must continually turn it over to the Lord and surround ourselves with people who urge us to trust His goodness. She reminds us there are things that give the enemy a foothold and each of us needs to identify what those are. “In order to see the miracle, you have to put your faith in the One Who tells you to go out into the deep,” says Angie. “And when the sky grows dark with rain and the water starts pouring in, remember the day He told you to do it anyway.”
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