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Founder of Virtuous Reality Ministries
Speaker
Education: University of Texas in Austin
Married to Keith, 3 children, Ryan, 16; Paige, 14; Hayden, 11
Vicki Courtney is hoping that a new and better women's movement will start. She is a national speaker and the head of Virtuous Reality Ministries. This ministry sponsors Yada Yada conferences for middle school and high school girls and their mothers to instill moral excellence, worth, purity, and strength by passing on godly principles.
Vicki's book Your Girl: Raising a Godly Daughter in an Ungodly World, which has corresponding journals for mother and daughter, came out of doing these and other conferences geared to women. Dedicated to her own teenage daughter, Paige, the book encourages mothers to rely on God's Word to pass on godly attributes to their daughters, such as worth, modesty, and purity. She urges mothers to "awaken from our slumber, equip ourselves for battle, and refuse to allow the world to take our girls by the hand and lead them into life."
Her heart is not just for raising godly daughters, but sons as well. Also a mother of two sons, she challenges women "to set the bar high when it comes to teaching sons to respect women."
Vicki highlights six battles for mothers to fight on behalf of their daughters. Vicki's approach to mothers teaching godly standards to their daughters is different. She challenges mothers to examine their own beliefs and actions. If they don't line up with God's standards, she tells mothers to change them before teaching their daughters.
In the first battle, the Dangers of Conformity, the focus is on standing up for godly principles, even if the surrounding culture is opposed to them and one must stand alone. Vicki tells mothers that first they must see the areas where they have settled for the world's standards versus godly standards and then choose to change them. For example, if a mother is obsessed with a small dress size, she communicates to her daughter that the outside of a person is more important than whom God created inside.
The second battle is Passing Down the Formula for Self-Worth. This means not basing self-worth on the world's standards, which focus on looks, what one does, or what others think. Instead, true self-worth should be defined by who one is in Jesus Christ. Mothers should expose to their daughters to how the world places values on external things and help them put their worth in Christ.
The third battle is Raising Daughters Who Say "I Don't" Until They Say "I Do." Here, Vicki breaks down the myths of having premarital sex and urges mothers to teach their daughters chastity until marriage.
The fourth battle is Dressed to Lure or Dressed to be Pure. This encourages mothers to teach daughters why and how to dress modestly.
The fifth battle, Prince Charming: Fact or Fairy Tale, dispels false beliefs about dating and relationships.
The sixth battle is Sugar and Spice and Not Everything Nice. This takes a look into issues of young women's peer groups, such as cliques, mean girls, gossip, and jealousy.
Vicki says the three things mothers can arm their daughters with to fight these battles are the heritage of God's Word, prayer, and faith.
The Next Gloria Steinem
Vicki Courtney was an agnostic for 21 years and a feminist. When she went to college at the University of Texas at Austin, she wanted to be the next Gloria Steinem. She was strongly opposed to Christianity in her college years. Then she happened to attend a Christian event on her college campus, and she gave her heart to Christ. After a few months, she felt that God was calling her to share her story.
Yada Yada
In time, she began speaking and ministering. At one women's conference in Houston, Texas, she was assigned to pray for people. She noticed that most of the women who had prayer requests were dealing with issues from their past. Vicki saw this need and thought that someone should minister to these women. Since she was impacted by a college event, she decided to hold an event for college women. The first event was successful, with 700 women in attendance. The next year they held another conference, and more than 1,000 young women attended. The need of these conferences is apparent as eight conferences are scheduled in 2004 and sixteen are scheduled in 2005.
The most popular of the conferences are Yada Yada conferences for seventh- through 12-graders and their mothers, and Yada Yada Jr., for third- through sixth-graders and their mothers. These conferences are a time of worship along with workshops on topics such as self-worth, relationship with God, and dating. The focus is to bring young women into moral excellence, worth, purity, and strength.
At the end of the conferences, the young women are called to make a virtue pledge before their mothers and peers. It is a moving event where young women promise to uphold godly values, stay pure, and walk in moral excellence. This pledge can be found on Virtuous Reality's Web site along with other support information for women of all ages. Vicki has been getting responses that the virtue pledges do work and that they help postpone sexual activity.
Vicki believes that investing in women today will have a huge payoff for the generations to come and that Virtuous Reality Ministries can be a tool to help "spark revival for a new and better women's movement." Vicki has a quote from American Founding Father John Adams that she loves to refer to:
If this is the case, we must make sure we are raising up godly women.
A caring friend will be there to pray with you in your time of need.
