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DR. LINDA
HELPS
Is It Wrong
To Get Angry?
By Linda
S. Mintle, Ph.D.
Dr. Linda Helps - One of the most frequent
questions I get asked is, "Should Christians get angry?"
For some reason, Christians think that anger is wrong and
has no place in their lives. I've even had family members
tell me in therapy that they have never been angry and won't
allow anger to ever surface. I want to pinch them to see
if they are alive (of course I resist this impulse). This
is a ridiculous claim and usually one of the reasons they
need therapy!
Anger is a God given emotion. Emotions are mood responses
to living our lives. Emotions are influenced by thoughts
and behavior. They are unpredictable but not good or bad.
They are simply a part of our human make-up, subject to
our control.
An emotion like anger comes as a response to something
that happens or to a thought you have about an event or
relationship. For example, you may get angry because your
teen broke the curfew rule. You may get angry with your
boss for piling up work with no extra pay. Or you may get
angry when your child refuses to comply with your directive.
To deny that you feel angry serves no purpose. In fact,
it can lead to all sorts of physical and emotional difficulties
over time. Unidentified anger is often the basis for conditions
such as depression, eating disorders, alcohol and drug problems.
When Jesus took the form of man and lived on the earth,
He experienced a wide range of emotions including compassion,
pity, grief, anguish and yes, anger. He got angry with the
Pharisees who continually tried to trap Him in their legalism,
and refused to recognize Him as the Messiah. And He got
angry with the moneychangers in the temple for making His
house a den of thieves and overthrew tables.
God acknowledged that anger is a part of our emotional
make-up when he said, "Be angry and do not sin"
(Ephesians 4:26). The first part of this scripture gives
permission to be angry. Anger can be used to correct wrong
and bring about good. One great place to direct your anger
is at sin and the enemy's schemes. Be like my seven year
old who says, "Let's stomp on that mean old devil.
He sure causes a lot of problems."
It's the mishandling of anger that becomes problematic.
That's why God adds, "Do not sin." God wants us
to learn to control this emotion and use it productively
not in destructive ways. He gives multiple guidelines for
dealing with anger so that it neither becomes harmful nor
takes root in the heart.
Dr. Mintle – author, professor,
Approved Supervisor and Clinical member of the American
Association for Marriage and Family Therapy – is a
speaker and media personality, as well as a licensed clinical
social worker with over twenty years in psychotherapy practice.
For more articles and information, visit Dr.
Linda Mintle's Web site.
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