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Medals Above My Heart
By Brenda Pace and Carol McGlothlin
Broadman & Holman Publishers
Leave and Cleave
If you want to experience the truth
of Genesis 2:24 (NASB)—“For this cause [the
covenant of marriage] a man shall leave his father and
his mother, and shall cleave to his wife”—just
marry a soldier, sailor, airman, coastguardsman, or marine.
You will then understand to the fullest just what God had
in mind when He gave this instruction!
Like me, most of you had already lived away
from home by the time you married, whether it was because
of college or a job. When you marry a military man, however,
leaving home may not only mean moving to another town but
possibly another country! Military orders are always just
around the corner, although they can take you clear around
the world. And while this can bring much angst for the
new military wife, it can also drive a military couple
to depend more upon each other.
This became especially true for my husband
and me (Carol) when after only nine months of marriage,
he received orders to report to Germany. I remember driving
to Charleston, South Carolina, thinking (as my parents
followed us in a car close behind), “This is it.
I will never see my parents or family again.” I had
known Richard for a very long time, but it became very
real to me that he was going to be all I had from this
point on. I was leaving behind everything else I held dear
in my life to travel halfway around the world. Would the
love we had for each other be strong enough to withstand
this adjustment?
They say, “All you need is love.” And
in a sense this is true—as long as it is God’s
love, not merely the natural, human kind. The world defines
love as a mysterious feeling a person falls into—and
out of—at the whim of fate. But the Bible is woven
with the thread of true love from beginning to end. Within
its covers we learn that true love is defined as passion
anchored by commitment.
At the wedding of their son recently, Brenda’s
husband, Richard, used a wonderful story to illustrate
this concept. He asked the congregation to imagine a kite
in the shape of a heart (representing our passion in a
relationship) attached to a string (representing our commitment).
Just as a kite dances in the breeze, the passion of true
love desires to dance in the winds of life and relationship.
Some may think the string of commitment holds this passion
back, but in fact it is just the opposite. If you cut the
string from a kite, it may momentarily look as though it
has sprung free to experience new flight. But if you follow
it long enough, you’ll eventually find the kite tangled
in a tree or broken on the ground.
To fly higher, a kite does not need to be
cut free; it just needs more string. The greater the cord
of commitment in a marriage, the higher the passions can
fly. When you become skilled in true love, knowing how
to balance both commitment and passion, your kite will
dance in the winds of love, free to soar and turn loops,
knowing the string of commitment will keep it safe.
Upon reflection I see I was being slightly
overdramatic in those early years when I thought I would
never see my family again. The fact is, the military forced
us to leave home and family, yet this transition actually
helped us choose to cleave to one another. I am grateful
that as a result of this choice, our commitment to one
another—and our love for one another—has been
solidified and strengthened.
Jesus stated in Mark 12:30-31 that the greatest
commandment is to “Love the Lord your God with all
your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind
and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love
your neighbor as yourself.’” Would it not be
safe to say that your closest neighbor is your spouse?
The charge given by Chaplain Pace at the
close of the wedding ceremony reflected the unique blessings
of a Jesus-centered marriage. He said, “My grandmother
passed on the secret of marital success to my bride and
me when we were married twenty-nine years ago, and today
I pass it on to you. She told me that if we both lived
first for the Lord and then lived for each other instead
of for ourselves, we would have a happy marriage. Her words
were not as eloquent as the Lord’s in Mark 12:31,
but she spoke with the confidence of experience that this
truth from the Word of God works in marriage.”
I can only add to that: “Amen!”
—Carol and Brenda
Prayer
Father, thank You for my husband and the
blessing he is to me. I am grateful that You have allowed
us to join in the covenant relationship of marriage. Help
me to be the best neighbor to him that I can be. Allow
our marriage to be characterized by passion anchored with
commitment. May the love we have for each other be greater
as a result of the love we have for You. Amen.
This excerpt from Medals Above My Heart is
used with permission. |
