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“To me it's not what's right and what's left,
it's what's right and what's wrong. My wife and I
will stand by that 'till the day we die, as far as
homosexuality is not in God's plan – it's wrong."
--Joe Stark
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homosexuality
Memphis Group under Fire for
Trying to Transform Gays
By David Brody
Capitol Hill Correspondent
CBN.com –
Can parents help children struggling with same-sex attractions
turn away from the homosexual lifetsyle? One Memphis father says
they can – and the city's gay community is none too happy
about it.
Joe Stark did what he believed any responsible Christian parent
would do. In late May, Joe’s 16-year-old son, Zach, told
his parents he was gay. The Starks, devout Christians, enlisted
the help of “Love in Action International,” a Memphis-based
ministry that provides prevention and treatment for behaviors
like homosexuality and drug addiction.
But little did the Starks know that their actions would create
a firestorm among local homosexuals. In an exclusive interview
with CBN News, Joe talked about his decision to enroll Zach in
the “Love in Action” program, and the controversy
that has followed.
“We felt very good about Zach coming here because…
to let him see for himself the destructive lifestyle, what he
has to face in the future, and to give him some options that society
doesn't give him today,” Stark said. “Knowing that
your son... statistics say that by the age of 30 he could either
have AIDS or be dead.”
The Starks' story took on a life of its own when Zach began posting
his thoughts on an Internet blog.
"My mother, father, and I had a very long 'talk'" he
wrote, "…where they let me know I am to apply for a
fundamentalist Christian program for gays… I’m a big
screw up to them, who isn't on the path God wants me to be on.
So I'm sitting here in tears."
“Zack has got a mind of his own, and that's a God-given
gift,” Joe said. “And Zack will have to make those
choices when he is an adult as to what exactly he is going to
do with his life. But until he turns 18 and he's an adult in the
state of Tennessee, I'm responsible for him. And I’m going
to see to it that he has all options available to him.”
It wasn't long after Zach's blog appeared online that protestors
began lining the streets outside “Love in Action.”
They said that homosexuality is not a choice but something that
comes naturally – and that Zach is being deceived by his
parents and “Love in Action.”
“When you ask someone to live in a lie, it's a dangerous,
dangerous slope that you're running down,” one protestor
said.
But according to Rev. John Smid, homosexuals do have a choice
– and his life is a perfect example. Smid is “Love
in Action's” executive director, and he left the homosexual
lifestyle in 1984. He's been happily married since 1988, and he
wants others like him who have struggled with homosexual feelings
to know that they do not have to act on their same-sex attractions.
“I just see so many people who want to discount my life,”
Smid said. “My story, my life, my experience, counts. And
I have found tremendous freedom from homosexuality and a deep
level of change in my life that would have never occurred had
I never been given the opportunity to leave homosexuality.”
Smid credits his faith in Jesus Christ for giving him the courage
to leave homosexuality behind. But his stance is anything but
popular among gays and their allies. Since the Zach Stark controversy
began, “Love in Action” has been investigated by the
state of Tennessee over allegations of child abuse. Although they
were cleared of all charges, the stigma remains, and those who
have followed the case closely say that's unfair.
“The child services of the state dismissed the charges,”
said Mike Fleming, a local radio host. “And I frankly think
that the bottom line of this is that homosexuals are afraid that
this does work, and they have set out to destroy “Love in
Action.” I don't think there can be any doubt about that.”
Gay groups have criticized “Love in Action's” techniques
as heavy-handed. Clients are forbidden from listening to secular
music, using the Internet, or wearing sexually suggestive clothing.
But Joe says that's one of the program's strengths.
“A lot of things that Zach spent a lot of his time doing
were taken away,” Stark said. “And I can see why they
do it now. It's because, if you're not doing those things, then
what are you doing? Sometime or other, you have to communicate
with your family. And that's a big thing that has happened in
our family – Zach is communicating a lot more with us.”
But critics say “Love in Action” doesn't work for
everyone. According to one former client, the program actually
helped him to embrace his homosexuality. He calls the program
"unrealistic."
“Rarely in life will you ever live that closed off from
the world,” Brandon Tidwell, a former client of “Love
in Action,” said. “It's very, I think, deceiving,
or misleading, or creates a false hope for people, to help them
to create change in that very isolated environment, and then move
out into the real world and try to continue to…understand
themselves in a whole different way.”
Smid points out that all of “Love in Action's” clients,
including Tidwell, have grown closer to their parents as a result
of the program. Many came away with a better understanding of
Jesus Christ as well. As for Zach, the jury is still out. But
his father remains steadfast that he made the right decision for
his son.
“To me it's not what's right and what's left, it's what's
right and what's wrong,” Joe said. “My wife and I
will stand by that 'till the day we die, as far as homosexuality
is not in God's plan – it's wrong."
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