Women Confess Post-Abortion Trauma in Web Series

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WASHINGTON - "Surrender the Secret," a new 10-part web series on KnockTV is addressing the post-traumatic plight of women who have had abortions.

Fifty-five million babies have been murdered by the abortion holocaust, and for years protestors have taken on the voice of these faceless and nameless victims.

But it's also brought years of surprising torment to women who thought getting rid of their unborn children would solve their problems.

Now women across the country are coming out about their abortions in order to end the agony, both for themselves and millions of others.

Surrender the Secret

The series tells the real-life abortion stories of five women and allows viewers to follow their post-abortion recovery.

They embark upon an 10-week healing journey using a Bible study called "Surrendering the Secret," authored by Pat Layton. The new web-series documents how they've gone from pain to peace.

Katy Flood leads the same kind of Bible study featured in "Surrender the Secret." She became one of these women 25 years ago.

Flood said the emotional pain after the abortion caused her immense problems.

"When you have an abortion you cover it up and you try to just move on and do life. And those issues come out in so many different ways," she said. "They say 43 percent of women will have an abortion."

Anna Higgins, director of Family Research Council's Center for Human Dignity, said post-abortive women can suffer from "depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and suicidal thoughts and behaviors. And it's a very widespread problem."

Silent Torment

Higgins said there's a reason women often keep this torment a secret.

"There's a lot of guilt and regret associated with abortion," she said.

According to researchers from the Elliot Institute, Bowling State University and the University of Texas, 92 percent of these women feel emotionally deadened, 86 percent experience rage, and up to 80 percent suffer post-abortion trauma.

In one episode of "Surrender the Secret," Kelly recalled, "I was numb. I was lost. And there was a girl laying in the cot next to me who was just weeping. She was so broken." 

At this year's March for Life rally in January, post-abortion mother Georgette Forney spoke of this pain.

"In addition to our children dying, a part of us dies right along with them," she explained.

In "Surrender the Secret," Jane shared her abortion experience.
 
"Started to cramp," she recalled. "My body started to go through all these changes. And, I mean, it was just horrible having to think about what was going on."

It was all for a young man who still left her.

"I loved this boy so much that I was willing to sacrifice my own baby to hold onto him," Jane said.

In the series, Courtney told of disappointing her stern father.

"I was in youth group," Courtney said. "I was the perfect daughter. And I ended up pregnant."

The father forced her to get rid of it. She recalled the abortionist describing an injection.

"That's going to make your baby have a heart attack. You may feel him thrash around and that's just him passing," she recalled the abortionist explaining.

"On June 21 at 5:35 I had my son into a bedpan sitting on a bed," Courtney said. "And they put him into a container and they carried him out of the room."

"It was the worst experience of my life," she continued. "And I named him. And to this day my dad still won't talk to me about it."

Bible study leader Jill Marquis said of Courtney's story, "This is what is real. This is what happens to women when they've had an abortion. This is the fall-out that they feel."

The leaders of the Bible study showcased in "Surrender the Secret" are trying to undo the damage by using God's truth to expose the lies Satan tells women.

"The biggest one is God can never forgive you for what you've done. And God will not only not forgive you, there will be retribution upon you," Kelly said.

Marquis said, "In Ezekiel 34, He says I will search for the lost and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured and strengthen the sheep."

"It's an encouraging environment," another woman named Vanessa said. "It's a safe place."

"It blows my mind that He can still love us after...He can still love me after what I did," Jane said.

Anything But 'Health Care'

At this year's March for Life there were many women with signs that said, "I regret my abortion." But for many millions more, they keep it to themselves as a painful secret.

"People need to know the truth. And I don't think the truth is spoken much in today's media," Jill said.

The truth, according to the FRC's Higgins, is that abortion is anything but "health care."

"If we did have millions of women stand up and say, 'Hey, this is not health care, this is harmful. Health care is not supposed to harm,' that would make a huge impact," Higgins said.

Marquis and Flood said they believe it could stop women who are contemplating the procedure.
 
"I think it would have profound effects for our entire country to stand up and say, 'I was one of those women who chose abortion, who thought it was okay, who thought it was the right choice to make,'" Flood said. "Now I don't think it's the right choice. And I don't want any other woman to have to suffer. So I think it would be amazing."

"They are going to see that abortion is not the choice that they want to make," Marquis said.

New episodes of "Surrender the Secret" premiere on the KnockTV every Tuesday. The series began Jan. 22.

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Paul  Strand

Paul Strand

CBN News Washington Sr. Correspondent

As senior correspondent in CBN's Washington, D.C., bureau, Paul Strand has covered a variety of political and social issues, with an emphasis on defense, justice, and Congress.  Follow Paul on Twitter @PaulStrandCBN and "like" him at Facebook.com/PaulStrandCBN.