I Believe In You!
By Dr. Greg Smalley
Smalley Relationship Center
"But encourage one another day after day, as long
as it is still called today..." — Hebrews
"I've hit the wall!" That was my first thought when
I felt an intense tingling throughout my body. "This can't
be happening now!" I pleaded with myself, "I still have
eight miles to go!" But with each step, my body engaged in
a war with my mind. On one side of the battle was that I had dreamed
and trained for six months to complete a marathon. On the other
side, however, was my body. At the eighteen mile marker I began
to experience severe cramping in my calves.
My wife, Erin, found me at the next mile marker. Expecting to
see me running along joyously, her first thought was that I was
injured. After explaining my dilemma, all I could think about
was quitting. In my mind, if I had to walk the remaining distance,
my dream of "running" a marathon was over. As I struggled
with each step, Erin said something I'll never forget. "I
believe in you!"
Looking back on the experience, Erin's encouragement seemed so
simple. "I believe in you." I've heard her use those
words many times before. But at that moment, during a time in
which I felt so defeated, her words were like a burst of energy.
The rest of the race looked like a scene out of a Rocky movie.
With each agonizing step, Erin was by my side. Some friends and
family who were watching even joined in the long walk. However,
as we reached the twenty-fourth mile, I couldn't endure walking
any longer. If I was going to finish the race, I had to start
running. After several yards, my calves began functioning again
and I was able to jog. Finally, after 26.6 long miles, Erin and
I crossed the finish line together. She believed in me.
The Power of Believing in Your Spouse
One of the greatest gifts you can give your mate is to believe
in his or her dreams. As the pressures of life intensify, sometimes
the difference between going after a dream and remaining passive
is having someone say, "I believe in you!" If this is
your desire, I encourage you to answer two important questions.
1. What are your mate's dreams? The first
step is to learn what your spouse is dreaming about. What specific
things motivate him in life? What does she want to accomplish
in her lifetime? During a road trip, Erin and I made a list
of all the things we wanted to complete before we die. As Erin
talked, I was amazed at the diversity of her dreams. I had no
idea she even dreamt about some of those things. Understanding
your mate's goals is a great way to deepen your intimacy.
2. What stands in his or her way? After hearing
about your mate's dreams, it's important to determine what might
inhibit realizing those goals. Is it a lack of confidence? Maybe
she doesn't know where to begin? Whatever the reason, I encourage
you to find out and assist him or her to overcome those barriers.
As I discovered while running the marathon, when someone believes
in you there's no limit to what can be accomplished. However,
a goal is only a dream until someone makes it a reality. And that
reality sometimes begins with a simple word of encouragement.
What a difference you can make if you always treat your mate not
as he might be at that moment, but as you know he can be.
© Copyright 2005 Smalley
Relationship Center. Used by permission.
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