Did you ever wish you had someone else’s job? Have you wondered how that person got that job? Whether it’s caused by wardrobe, parking space, job title, or paycheck, jealousy on the job is as common as it is dangerous. Luckily, we can free ourselves from this torment tomorrow as well as today. We’ll look at how to increase our happiness and success on the job in part two of our series — balancing tomorrow’s jealousy, today – at work.

I’m pretty sure we each have had some encounter with jealousy on the job. You may even have experienced that jealousy turn into snobbery, subterfuge, or even sabotage. Jealousy, unfortunately, hurts everyone on the job. It derails the person experiencing the jealousy, preventing them from realizing their own path and potential. Jealousy hurts and alienates those whom are its objects. And it can decimate job satisfaction, motivation, and productivity.

Employers can’t just post signs saying, “This is a jealousy-free zone. No jealousy permitted!” (Though I wouldn’t mind seeing this!) Jealousy is a weakness or a demon that we quietly harbor inside us, often not knowing it is there until it is too late and the damage is done. Why does this “green-eyed monster” surface at work? Let’s take a look.

No matter what your job or career entails, we all share some common desires. Regardless of how we prioritize these desires, we all want to be able to pay our bills, have some time off to rest and relax, feel important, make a difference, improve our living conditions, take care of our loved ones, and have a pleasant work environment. When we feel these are being threatened, we do crazy things! If I think my job might be in danger, for example, I might see that new hotshot manager as the reason and start sabotaging his or her effectiveness. If you didn’t get the same pay raise as one of your peers, you may start treating that person disrespectfully or try to make them screw up on the job. These reactions aren’t pretty and they certainly aren’t productive. So why do we sometimes react this way?

Believe it or not, it is usually because we are scared. Okay, I said it. Now I know you may not like it, because I know I don’t, but I have to admit it is true. Whether you are a big strapping male or a quiet young girl, it does not matter. Fear and jealousy go hand in hand and nobody is immune. We can, however, learn to react differently when we feel or see jealousy rearing its hoary head in the workplace.

If we can admit that our jealous feelings today are caused by something we are afraid of within ourselves, we can begin to eliminate tomorrow’s jealous feelings.

Checklist for Balancing Jealousy at Work

• Treat jealousy as an old friend…“Oh, hello what are you doing here?”
• Figure out your fear…“Okay, I know you’re in there somewhere!”
• Face your fear…“I know, I stink at doing __________ (fill in the blank) and I don’t like seeing others excel where I don’t or can’t.”
• Find your way… “I guess I’m not really applying myself and should find ways to get better at what I do.” OR “I don’t think I’m really doing what I am good at and should find a better fit.”
• Praise the day…“Wow, that little jealousy fit taught me a lot about my self and my job! I feel more confident and productive already…who knew!”

We are all human and may always find jealousy wriggling its way into our lives. The trick is to catch it before it creeps into our actions. We can learn a lot from our jealousy. How we address it today will determine how we experience it tomorrow. Dealing with our jealousy, like balancing, is a process, not a destination. Start processing it today!

Dr. Stacie L. L. Morgan is a strategy consultant, international speaker, and author. For more information, send her an e-mail or visit her site, www.balancedmanagement.com.