Pregnant? I'm too Old!
I believe I know how Sarah in the Bible must have felt
when she was told that she was pregnant. "Pregnant? Me? No
way, I'm too old!"
I am not pregnant in the natural, but I have been told many times
that I am pregnant in the spiritual. I recently heard a women's
minister talk about being pregnant in the spiritual realm. She
told of how God has impregnated us with ministry and how one day
this ministry would be birthed.
I felt too old to be this way in the natural, as I was soon to
be 48 years old. In the spirit, I felt as if I were too old and
too tired to get excited about the word I was hearing. When I
was younger, a message of this kind would have excited me for
days, weeks, and perhaps months; yet this time I could not grab
it for five seconds. Too many unfulfilled dreams lay in the dust.
There were too many prophecies that seemed lost, and I felt powerless
to believe them any longer.
As I shared my feelings with a friend the next day, the Holy
Spirit tugged on my heart. I could hear myself as I spoke those
words of defeat and discouragement. I thought of Sarah in Genesis
chapter 18 when she was told in her old age she would be pregnant
and bear a son:
"Where is your wife Sarah?" they asked him. "There,
in the tent," he said. Then the LORD said, "I will
surely return to you about this time next year, and Sarah your
wife will have a son." Now Sarah was listening at the entrance
to the tent, which was behind him. Abraham and Sarah were already
old and well advanced in years, and Sarah was past the age of
childbearing. So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, "After
I am worn out and my master is old, will I now have this pleasure?"
Then the LORD said to Abraham, "Why did Sarah laugh and
say, `Will I really have a child, now that I am old?" (Genesis
18: 9-13, NIV)
Sarah was having a hard time believing that what God was promising
her would really come true. But the next verse is what Sarah needed
to hear, and it is what I needed to be reminded of also:
"Is anything too hard for the LORD? I will return
to you at the appointed time next year and Sarah will have a
son." (Genesis 18:14, NIV)
Those words brought life back into my spirit. Is anything too
hard for God? Can I truly walk in a calling that was placed over
my life -- even before I was born -- now that I am old? Will God
keep His word He impregnated me with years ago? Could it really
I had not realized I had given up on the vision God had given
me for my life. I had been busy doing the routine things with
vigor. Yet, in my heart, I longed for much more. I wanted to be
used by God and see His power flowing from me to others in need.
I craved the anointing of God to preach and teach His Word to
those who needed to hear about the God of Love. The Scripture
in Isaiah had for years rung in my ears:
"The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the
LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek;
he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty
to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that
are bound" (Isaiah 61:1, KJV).
I must not give up, and neither should you. Whatever God has
spoken into your life, don't let go of it. Keep your vision clear
and continue to believe. Nothing is impossible with God. Nothing
can stop us from receiving all God has promised us except our
doubt and unbelief.
Yes, I'm pregnant -- pregnant with renewed faith, hope, and promise.
You can be, too.
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