CBN TEACHING SHEET
Trapped In Temptation --
How to Break an Addiction to Pornography
Introduction
Testimony: Free After 40 Years
A Growing Epidemic
What's The Harm?
Quiz: Are You Hooked?
The Heart Of The Problem
What The Bible Says About Pornography
Ten Steps To Freedom In Christ
1. Turn To Jesus!
2. Spend Time With God Daily
3. Choose Your Allies
4. Count The Consequences
5. Identify Your Triggers
6. "HALT"
7. Dig Out The Roots
8. Take Authority Over Your Eyes
9. Grow In God’s Word
10. Pray Continually
The Most Important Prayer
Helpful Ministries
Further Reading
Introduction
God wants us to walk in the power of the Holy Spirit and to experience
His victory in every area of our lives. Tragically, sin and addiction
can quickly rob us of the joy and freedom we should enjoy through Christ
Jesus.
Sin has been around since Satan convinced Adam and Eve that they needed
something outside of God’s will, but it is increasingly evident
in our culture today. Behavior that used to be considered shameful is
now flaunted. Recently, there has been an astronomical rise in the amount
of pornography which is readily available over the Internet, on television,
and in other media. Consequently, more people are exposed to it –
and more are hooked. Although Christians may think they should be immune
to pornography’s attraction, increasing numbers of believers are
falling prey to its powerful lure and becoming addicted.
If you feel trapped in an endless cycle of lust, guilt, and broken
promises, God wants to set you free! Jesus said, “The thief comes
only to steal, and kill, and destroy; I have come that they may have
life, and might have it abundantly” (John 10:10, NRSV). The Bible
promises that the power of sin is broken by Christ as we surrender to
Him (see Romans 6:1-14).
As you read this booklet, may you discover how much God wants to forgive
you, deliver you, and give you the abundant life that He has promised
to all who follow Him.
Testimony: Free After 40 Years
Outwardly, Phil and Bobi Naukam looked like a happy couple. With others,
Phil seemed kind and friendly, but alone with Bobi and their three children,
he was sarcastic, abusive, and full of rage. The underlying reason:
his 40-year addiction to pornography since age 13. As a young man, Phil
served in the military, where porn was considered macho. He recalls
that when he married Bobi, “I didn’t know what marriage
was about. Playboy taught me about relationships and intimacy.”
Bobi thought the problem was solved when she told him to get rid of
those magazines – but secretly, he remained heavily addicted for
33 years of their marriage. Keeping such a big secret from those closest
to him caused Phil to become increasingly withdrawn and emotionally
absent from the family.
Bobi says that The 700 Club was her mainstay during those turbulent
years. When she had nowhere else to turn, she called The 700 Club Prayer
Counseling Center for help. “Whenever I had a crisis, I would
call,” she says. “Our daughter had seven surgeries, including
a cancer diagnosis before age 15. Phil didn’t go with me for the
surgeries. When I was in the hospital waiting room, I’d call CBN’s
toll-free prayer line. Sometimes they would call me, and I would give
them 27 requests! They were my mentors.”
Although he never committed physical adultery, Phil admits, “I
had lots of emotional affairs.” He was unwilling to deal with
their problems through marriage counseling, and the couple separated.
Only then did Phil finally confess his addiction to Bobi – but
was still unwilling to give it up.
During their seven-year separation, Bobi came alone to a conference
at CBN, where her heart was stirred by renewed faith in Jesus Christ.
She recalls, “The question God answered that weekend for me was
that I would make it – joyfully – no matter what happened
with Phil. If my marriage was never healed, I could go forward with
Christ.” When Pat Robertson asked for testimonies, she sensed
God prompting her to share her new-found hope. In front of the gathering,
Bobi revealed the pain in her marriage caused by Phil’s addiction
to porn, saying, “My only hope is that Jesus is my husband, and
He’s in control, so I can obey Him without fear.” As Pat
prayed for her, she felt God’s power. Later, Bobi tried to sneak
away from the conference, embarrassed that everyone now knew her dark
and shameful secret. However, she found herself surrounded by other
women – who thanked her and confided that their husbands, too,
struggled with pornography!
Soon after, Phil finally recognized what a terrible toll this “harmless”
activity was taking on himself, his wife, his children, and his relationship
with the Lord. He cried out to God: “I don’t want to be
like this. Help me get out!” His prayer was answered through a
Christian ministry to porn addicts, where he found a deeper relationship
with Christ and learned the importance of yielding to God and being
transparent with others. After the decades it took to reach a breaking
point and finally be ready to surrender to God, Phil achieved a total
victory over his lifelong obsession in just a matter of weeks.
In 2002, Phil and Bobi renewed their wedding vows, and today they minister
to others who want to break their addiction to porn. Bobi eventually
made a return trip to CBN – this time, with Phil. She introduced
her husband, saying joyfully, “I brought my miracle with me!”
Phil and Bobi have found true freedom in Christ – and you can,
too!
A Growing Epidemic
A Christian may think he or she is the only believer in town struggling
with porn. Unfortunately, that’s far from true. Addiction to pornography
is rapidly becoming an epidemic throughout our society and even in the
Church.
The main reason: widespread accessibility. What used to be available
only in a city’s red-light district is now in plain view on the
covers of sexy magazines at convenience stores … in Hollywood
films, TV shows and commercials … on life-size posters at the
mall and larger-than-life billboards along the highway … in suggestive
lingerie ads in the Sunday newspaper … and on millions of websites.
Years ago, people had to take a risk to visit an “adult bookstore”
– after all, they might be seen by someone they knew! But with
the Internet, people can now inflame and indulge their sexual appetites
with erotic material at any time, in any neighborhood, in the total
privacy of their living rooms.
Although pornography is more common among men, many women are also
becoming hooked – not so much by visual imagery, but by the emotional
intimacy available through Internet chat rooms.
People often hope that their desire for porn will diminish when they
get married or grow older, but the emotional and physiological factors
can be continuing problems.
What's The Harm?
Many people deny or rationalize their use of porn, saying: “It’s
only entertainment! What’s the harm in looking at pictures? God
created beautiful bodies, and I enjoy seeing them. After all, looking
doesn’t hurt anybody!”
The truth is, looking at pornographic images erodes healthy relationships
and can easily become a pathway to adultery and other serious problems.
Sexual intercourse within marriage draws a couple together physically,
emotionally and spiritually as they desire to please one another; it
can also produce the gift of children. In contrast, self-stimulation
and sexual gratification for its own sake is simply to fulfill one’s
own lust.
Men who ogle photos of idealized, airbrushed glamour girls in sexy
positions probably will not find satisfaction with their real-life wives.
A woman who discovers her husband using porn feels betrayed. Even if
he has been physically faithful to her, it’s terribly hurtful
to realize that he has been having emotional affairs with other women.
Conversely, a man would feel betrayed to discover his wife having sexually
explicit conversations with other men on the Internet.
Adolescent girls and young women are also negatively influenced by
our culture’s overemphasis on sexy, “perfect” bodies.
Many struggle with anorexia or bulimia – or even desire plastic
surgery – so they can emulate an unrealistic, “ideal”
female figure.
Another side-effect of the porn epidemic is evident in the workplace,
where growing numbers of employees use their computers for porn –
essentially stealing time and productivity from their employers. Some
are so hooked that they continue looking at porn on company time even
after being warned that this will result in losing their jobs.
Tragically, a casual interest in so-called “soft-core”
porn can develop into an insatiable thirst for hard-core porn, leading
some addicts into strip clubs, massage parlors, voyeurism, child pornography,
and pedophilia.
Some people feel so hopelessly trapped that they think there is no
way out. One man told CBN that he almost committed suicide because of
his lifelong addiction to pornography. He said, “I was flawed
to the point where there was nothing that could be done about me. And
so the only alternative was to end my life.” Fortunately, he realized
he was wrong – and that there is hope.
Respected counselors who work with child molesters, voyeurs, sadomasochists,
and rapists say that pornography is usually a significant factor in
these behaviors. Shortly before his execution, serial killer Ted Bundy
invited Dr. James Dobson of Focus on the Family to interview him on
death row. Bundy urgently wanted to warn people about the terrible dangers
of porn. A report about the interview is featured on the website, Family.org.
“I was a normal person,” Bundy said. “I had good friends.
I led a normal life, except for this one, small but very potent and
destructive segment that I kept very secret and close to myself.”
And so an addicting behavior that began at age 13 when he found dirty
magazines in a dumpster culminated in the brutal murders of 28 innocent
women and girls.
While Ted Bundy represents the extreme, “Jeff” is more
typical. He and his lovely wife live in a nice suburban home with their
kids and are active at church. But Jeff never felt accepted by his father
and used porn to soothe the hurt. This eventually led to squandering
money on prostitutes. When his wife discovered his infidelity, she was
shocked to learn that they were heavily in debt, his job could be in
jeopardy, and he needed to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases,
including AIDS. After intensive work and Christian counseling, Jeff
was delivered from his addicting actions and their marriage was saved
– but even so, it was a long time before Jeff regained his wife’s
trust.
Yes, porn has a price – and it can cost you everything.
Quiz: Are You Hooked?
If you’re wondering whether you’re hooked on porn, answer
the following questions honestly:
1. Do your family or friends say you spend too much time on the Internet?
2. (Particularly for women:) Do you find your greatest source of emotional
intimacy in Internet chat rooms?
3. Do you stare at or flirt with people other than your spouse, or fantasize
about people such as actors or actresses, lingerie models, joggers on
the beach, etc.?
4. Do you regularly look at pornographic magazines, movies, or websites?
5. Do you masturbate while doing any of the above?
6. Do your sexual fantasies and activities draw you away from your spouse,
your family, and God?
7. Do you lie about your activities or hide them from your family?
8. Do your sexual fantasies and activities cause you shame or depression?
9. Have you had phone sex or an extramarital affair, or visited prostitutes,
strip clubs, or massage parlors?
10. Have you vowed to stop, only to give in the next time temptation
arises?
Saying “Yes” to any questions, especially numbers 3 through
10, may indicate that pornography has some power over your life. But
take courage! With God’s help, you can win a resounding victory
over sexual temptation!
The Heart Of The Problem
Within each person, God has placed a fundamental need for intimacy.
We see this clearly in creation, when God said, “It is not good
for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). This desire for emotional
intimacy is normally filled through healthy relationships with one’s
parents, siblings, friends, and spouse. For various reasons, however,
some people struggle to connect with others and have difficulty developing
close relationships. When people feel empty on the inside, this emotional
vacuum can be easily filled with a counterfeit intimacy – selfish
sexual gratification. True intimacy satisfies this God-given need, but
fantasies and masturbation leave people feeling empty, worthless, and
trapped in a vicious cycle. The more they use pornography, the more
it separates them from others and hinders their ability to develop healthy
relationships. The more alone they feel, the greater their desire for
intimacy, and the more they are driven to fill the void with pornography.
Freedom comes by dealing with the heart – the deepest inner-core
of our being.
Jesus emphasized the importance of the inner life by saying, “For
from within, out of men’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality,
… [and] adultery” (Mark 7:21). Also, Paul wrote: “You
must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking.
They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life
of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening
of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves
over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with
a continual lust for more” (Ephesians 4:17b-19).
What The Bible Says About Pornography
Although God’s Word doesn’t specifically mention pornography,
it most definitely addresses the issues of inappropriate sexual arousal
and promiscuousness. The Ten Commandments say, “You shall not
commit adultery” and “You shall not covet … your neighbor’s
wife” (Exodus 20:14, 17). But Jesus set an even higher standard
– clearly warning about the destructiveness of “just looking.”
He said, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit
adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully
has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right
eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better
for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be
thrown into hell” (Matthew 5:27-29). Jesus was using a figure
of speech to say that we should take drastic action – to do whatever
it takes – to stop sinning. Obviously, that means not looking
with a lustful eye.
Similarly, Proverbs cautions us not to underestimate the tremendous
power of visual enticement. “Do not lust in your heart after her
beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes, for … the adulteress
preys upon your very life. Can a man scoop fire into his lap without
his clothes being burned?” (Proverbs 6:25-27).
Also, 1 Corinthians 6:13b-15 tell us: “The body is not meant
for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.
By His power God raised the Lord from the dead, and He will raise us
also. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ Himself?
Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute?
Never!”
The passage continues with a very interesting directive. God’s
Word often commands us to “stand firm” in battle. But when
it comes to sexual temptation, the Bible says to run away – fast!
“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are
outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is
in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were
bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body” (vs. 18-20).
God wants us to live up to a higher standard than the world’s,
with Jesus as our role model. We are not to live like people in the
world, nor should we try to get away with as much as we can without
actually breaking His laws. The world says, “What’s wrong
with Playboy?” But Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage should be
honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the
adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” A marriage bed cannot
be pure if one of the partners is fantasizing about another person.
And whether we are single or married, the Bible exhorts us, “But
among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of
any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s
holy people” (Ephesians 5:3).
Galatians 5 lists many pitfalls, beginning with sexual immorality,
impurity and debauchery. It concludes by giving us a clear choice: “Those
who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit
of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
gentleness, and self-control. ... Those who belong to Christ Jesus have
crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we
live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit” (vs.
21b-25).
Are you ready to choose God’s pathway to spiritual victory?
Ten Steps To Freedom In Christ
Once you make a decision to turn away from sin, there are a number
of important things you must do to achieve lasting triumph over temptation
and addicting actions.
1. Turn To Jesus!
People struggling with sin may think, “I’ll turn to God
after I clean up my act, but I’m not good enough to come to Him
yet.” Here’s the plain truth: you can never clean yourself
up enough for God – but He will do it for you! Ephesians 2:8-9
tells us, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith
– and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God –
not by works, so that no one can boast.” Jesus loves you and paid
for every single one of your sins by His death on the cross.
When you truly repent of your sins and give God your whole life –
broken and messy as it may be – He gladly accepts you as His child
and gives you a new life. The Bible says, “Put off your old self,
which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in
the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be
like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22-24).
This describes a new life in God! You take off the old self and are
made new by Jesus Christ. You give Him your sinful nature, and He gives
you His righteousness and holiness. You give Him your weakness, and
He gives you His power.
Simply pray: “Jesus, I confess that I have sinned again and again.
I feel trapped in addicting habits, but I am reaching out to you in
hope and faith. Thank You for dying on the cross for me. Please forgive
me and grant me a new start today. I give myself to You and invite You
to be Lord of my life. Thank You for saving me from the power of sin
and death. Please fill me with Your Holy Spirit and give me Your power,
wisdom and grace so that I can obey You and walk according to Your ways
every moment of every day. Amen.”
In 1 John 1:8-9, God promises to forgive all our sins if we are honest
with Him about our failings. Look at King David. The Bible spares no
detail about how this great hero of Israel failed miserably when he
was tempted sexually (see 2 Samuel 11:1-12:25). When David should have
been on the battlefield with his men, he lingered in Jerusalem and happened
to see a beautiful woman bathing on her rooftop. Now, that accidental
glimpse was not sin. But he allowed his eyes to linger, and that led
to lust, which in turn led to adultery, lies, betrayal, and murder.
David fell into the pattern of sin described in James 1:14-15: “But
each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away
and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin;
and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.”
Yet David found forgiveness and mercy when he finally stopped pretending
that nothing was wrong and humbly repented. Read through his heartfelt
prayer in Psalm 51, and consider making it your own:
Psalm 51:1-17 For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the
prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.
Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according
to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my
iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and
my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and
done what is evil in your sight, so that you are proved right when you
speak and justified when you judge. Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful
from the time my mother conceived me. Surely you desire truth in the
inner parts ; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place. Cleanse me with
hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. Create in
me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not
cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore
to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain
me. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn
back to you. Save me from bloodguilt, O God, the God who saves me, and
my tongue will sing of your righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, and
my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice,
or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The
sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.
We can also be encouraged by Paul’s example. Although he was
a great evangelist and wrote much of the New Testament, Paul struggled
with something he called “a thorn in the flesh.” After pleading
with the Lord to remove it, Paul received an answer that gives us hope
for any situation or temptation we may face: “But He said to me,
‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect
in weakness.’” Paul commented, “Therefore I will boast
all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power
may rest on me” (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Praise God – we are weak, but He is strong! We may fail, but
He will give us a new start every time we humbly come to Him!
2. Spend Time With God Daily
It’s absolutely essential that we look to God for strength and
wisdom each day. Spend time reading, studying and meditating on the
Scriptures daily. Start with the passages listed in this booklet. The
Word of God is your spiritual armor, and you dare not enter the battle
without it!
Daily prayer is also necessary for victory. James 1:5-6 instructs us:
“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously
to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when
he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like
a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”
Learn to cry out to God quickly when confronted by trials, temptation,
and a desire to yield to addicting behavior. When Peter was sinking
in the waves, he prayed one of the shortest prayers in the Bible –
“Lord, save me!” – and was immediately rescued by
the Lord (see Matthew 14:22-33).
Prayerfully reflect on the names of God, which reveal His wonderful
character, such as Father, Strong Deliverer, Redeemer, Master, Savior,
Mighty God, Helper, Light of the World, Faithful and True, Friend of
Sinners, the Way, the Truth, and the Life.
Give yourself entirely to God daily. Romans 12:1b-2a says, “Offer
your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this
is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern
of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
Rest assured: God will deliver you from sinful habits and addicting
behavior if you fully trust Him and do not doubt Him or depend on your
own thinking. Sometimes this happens instantaneously, but other times
He wants us to walk into victory one small step at a time. This walk
of faith is described in Proverbs 3:5-8: “Trust in the Lord with
all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways
acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Do not be wise
in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health
to your body and nourishment to your bones.”
3. Choose Your Allies
Although we certainly must go directly to God, confess our sin, and
receive forgiveness, there are times that we really need the Body of
Christ. Many who have been freed from pornography say they could not
win the battle alone. Consider choosing a trusted ally or two to help
you gain the victory over addicting habits. Jesus said, “If two
of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for
you by My Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in
My name, there am I with them” (Matthew 18:19-20).
Going to church on Sunday morning is great, but honest one-on-one relationships
are also very effective. As long as people hide a dark secret, it can
have power over them. But when that secret is shared with a trusted
counselor, its power can be broken! James 5:16 says, “Therefore
confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you
may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”
Of course, it’s critically important to find the right person
– such as a pastor, counselor, elder, or a very mature Christian
friend. It’s best if men meet with men and women meet with women.
A good mentor demonstrates God’s love, mercy and truth while able
to ask hard questions, hold a person accountable, and rejoice with each
success. Above all, this person must be totally trustworthy and never
repeat confidences without a person’s permission.
Some people find a great deal of help in overcoming addicting behavior
by attending Christian accountability groups that offer confidentiality.
Proverbs 11:14b says, “Many advisers make victory sure.”
Some of the ministries listed at the end of this booklet have small
group meetings.
4. Count The Consequences
“Jerry” is a born-again, Spirit-filled Christian who is
happily married to a beautiful, caring woman. He’s a good dad
to his children, a model schoolteacher, well-regarded in the community,
and a respected leader in his church. Nevertheless, Jerry struggled
long and hard with an addiction to porn – even after counseling
sessions with his pastor. But one day, his accountability group asked
him to look into the future and describe where his addiction to porn
would lead. Thoughtfully, he replied, “Ultimately, I would lose
my wife, my family, my home, my job, and my ministry.” After taking
a long, hard look at the consequences, Jerry decided that pornography
simply wasn’t worth it – and that helped set him free.
Take time to carefully examine your life and think about what is most
precious to you. Then ask yourself, Am I really willing to risk it all?
5. Identify Your Triggers
It’s important to identify exactly what situations trigger you
to stumble and fall into addicting activities – such as walking
past a magazine rack at the gas station, driving through a certain part
of town, staying in a hotel during a business trip, opening the Sunday
paper with the lingerie ads, logging on to the Internet, etc. Once you
know your weak points, you must be very methodical about avoiding these
situations. For example, if you are tempted to watch pornographic movies
on cable TV while away on business trips, ask the hotel to disconnect
or remove your television before you enter your room. Another good defense
is to call a mentor or accountability partner. That person can agree
with you in prayer and speak the truth of God’s Word, breaking
the power of that temptation.
If you’re married, you may want to enlist your spouse in helping
you avoid certain triggers. One man asked his wife to remove all the
lingerie sale fliers from the Sunday paper before bringing it into the
house. Another man asked his wife to change the password on their computer
so he could never log on without her knowledge.
6. "HALT"
The acronym “HALT” may be helpful, reminding you not to
get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. Realize that you are more vulnerable
to addicting behavior during these times, then HALT – immediately
stop what you are doing to pray, read your Bible, and/or call someone
for prayer. Of course, you may always call The 700 Club Prayer Counseling
Center at (800) 759-0700 for prayer and encouragement, 24 hours a day,
seven days a week.
7. Dig Out The Roots
Another way to gain victory in the future is to examine your past.
If you have never forgiven certain people for hurting you, take time
to do it right now! Lack of forgiveness hinders the flow of God’s
power in our lives. Jesus said, “Therefore I tell you, whatever
you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will
be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone,
forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins”
(Mark 11:24-25).
Sometimes, Christians like to move forward without looking back –
but if hurts from the past are preventing wholeness today, it may be
helpful to deal with these wounds through prayerful Christian counseling.
Truth comes through the Spirit of Christ – and as John 8:32 says,
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
Also, the books listed at the end of this pamphlet are excellent resources
for individual study.
8. Take Authority Over Your Eyes
Every Man’s Battle, by Arterburn, Stoeker and Yorkey, contains
practical hints about how to win over sexual temptation. The authors
suggest developing the habit of immediately “bouncing your eyes”
away from anything that tempts you. If you’re watching a great
football game on TV and a sexy beer commercial comes on – zap
it with your remote instantly! If you’re at work and notice that
a co-worker’s blouse is too low or her skirt is too high, turn
away immediately – or look her squarely in the eyes, and nowhere
else. Just as you developed a habit of impure thoughts, you can now
develop a habit of purity, with God’s help.
9. Grow In God's Word
This teaching is full of powerful Scripture verses to help you grow
in spiritual strength and maturity. Take time to look them up and underline
them in your Bible, and memorize the ones that are most helpful to you
personally. Here are some additional passages to study:
Genesis 39 1 |
Corinthians 10:12-13 |
Psalm 51 2 |
Corinthians 10:3-5 |
Psalm 119:9-11 |
Galatians 5:1, 13, 16-18 |
Proverbs 6:20-24 |
Ephesians 2:10 |
Proverbs 23:26-28 |
Ephesians 5:1-33 |
Daniel 3 |
Ephesians 6:10-18 |
Matthew 26:41 |
Philippians 4:8 |
Mark 7:20-23 |
Colossians 3:1-10 |
Luke 4:1-12 1 |
Thessalonians 4:1-8 |
John 10:10 1 |
Timothy 6:11-12 |
John 15:1-17 |
2 Timothy 2:22 |
John 17:3 |
Titus 2:11-14 |
Acts 15:28-29 |
1 Peter 2:16 |
Romans 1:16-32 |
1 Peter 4:1-6 |
Romans 6:23 |
Hebrews 4:15-16 |
Romans 7:15-8:14 |
James 1:13-15 |
Romans 12:1-2 |
James 4:1-10 |
Romans 13:12-14 |
Revelation 2:7 |
10. Pray Continually
Prayer is our lifeline to the Savior, who can rescue us from every
trial, temptation and addiction. The Bible says, “Pray continually”
(1 Thessalonians 5:17). You may wish to be guided by this wonderful
prayer that Jesus gave His disciples in Matthew 6:9b-13:
“Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name.” [Spend time
praising God for His love, wisdom and power, and for all that He has
done for you.]
“Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”
[Ask God to fulfill His marvelous purposes in your life, in the lives
of your loved ones, and others].
“Give us today our daily bread.” [Pray that you will trust
Him to give you the strength you need for every situation you may encounter
today. Lift up any other needs you or your family may have.]
“Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”
[Confess any sins you have committed and forgive anyone who has sinned
against you.]
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil
one.” [Ask God to help you obey as He leads you away from the
road that leads to evil and destruction and guides you in the paths
of righteousness. Spend time listening to His voice speaking in your
heart, giving you encouragement, admonition, or instructions. Commit
all that you say and do today unto Him.] Amen!
May God bless you as you trust Him each day for strength, wisdom and
victory.
The Most Important
Prayer
If you have never asked Jesus to be your Lord and Savior and don't
know how, it's easy. It's so simple that many people think it can't
be for real . . . but it is! God knew that not one of us would be able
to personally make up for the things He doesn't want us to do. This
is called sinning or rebelling against God. So He sent His Son Jesus
to pay the penalty for the sins of every person once and for all.
For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified
freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.
(Rom. 3:23)
While this may be hard for you to understand just now, all you need
to do is believe that Jesus died for you, confess to God that there
is sin in your life, and accept His forgiveness and His gift of eternal
life.
Don't wait another moment, pray this prayer right now and put God in
charge of your life:
Dear Lord Jesus, I believe that You are the Son of God. I believe
that You died for my sins and rose from the grave. I invite You into
my heart and receive You right now. Thank You for forgiveness. Thank
You for a new life. Help me to be what You want me to be and live
your life through me. Amen.
Have you invited Jesus Christ to be your Lord and Savior? Send
us an e-mail so that we can pray with you and send you some resources
to help you get started in your walk with God. Or you can call our 24-hour
prayer line at 1-800-759-0700.
You have just made the most important decision of your life by accepting
Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. With Him by your side, you are
ready to face the road ahead. And you can face it with the assurance
of God's promise:
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who
love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Rom. 8:28)
That means that God will cause even this pregnancy to work together
for your good. And He will see you through the challenging moments and
difficult decisions of the next few months.
Helpful Ministries
Here are some national ministries that we can recommend:
Desert Stream Ministries
Founded and directed by Andrew Comiskey, author of Pursuing Sexual Wholeness
and the Living Waters program, this ministry brings the healing power
of Jesus to men and women struggling with sexual and relational issues
such as homosexuality, sexual addiction, and sexual abuse. Ministry
groups are held throughout the U.S.
P.O. Box 17635, Anaheim, CA 92817-7635
714-779-6899
www.DesertStream.org
Exodus International
This worldwide interdenominational organization ministers the transforming
power of the Lord Jesus Christ to those affected by homosexuality.
P.O. Box 540119, Orlando, FL 32854
888-264-0877
www.Exodus-International.org
eXXit
This website provides resources such as a daily three-minute Bible study
to help those struggling with pornography to stand strong and resist
temptation.
www.eXXit.org
Faithful And True Ministries
This ministry features the resources of Mark Laaser, Ph.D., author of
several books on sexual addiction.
6542 Regency Lane, Eden Prairie, MN 55344 www.FaithfulAndTrueMinistries.com
Focus on the Family
This ministry features the resources of author Dr. James Dobson and
other Christian experts on a myriad of topics including marriage, the
family, pornography, and unfaithfulness.
800-A-FAMILY (232-6459)
www.Family.org and
www.PureIntimacy.org
Heart to Heart Counseling Centers
Features the resources of Dr. Douglas Weiss, a counselor, lecturer and
author of such books as Faithful and True: Sexual Integrity in a Fallen
World and 101 Practical Exercises for Sexual Addiction Recovery.
5080 Mark Dabling Blvd., Colorado Springs, CO 80918
719-278-3708
www.SexAddict.com
Overcomers Outreach
This Christian-based addiction ministry uses a 12-step support group
model.
P.O. Box 2208, Oakhurst, CA 93644
800-310-3001
www.OvercomersOutreach.org
Pure Life Ministries
This ministry offers the resources of author Steve Gallagher, plus residential
care, phone counseling, help for wives of men in sexual sin, and Men
of Purity Weekends.
14 School Street, Dry Ridge, KY 41035
877-301-7566
www.PureLifeMinistries.org
Sought Out, Inc.
Based in Virginia, this ministry proclaims sexual redemption in Christ
from pornography, adultery, and same-sex attraction.
P.O. Box 62019, Virginia Beach, VA 23466
757-631-0099
www.SoughtOut.org
Stone Gate Resources
This ministry features the resources of Dr. Harry Schaumburg.
11509 Palmer Divide Road, Larkspur, CO 80118 303-688-5680 www.StoneGateResources.org
Theophostic Prayer Ministries
Pastors, professional counselors, and lay ministers use this method
of prayer counseling to bring the healing power of Jesus to people with
a wide variety of emotional wounds.
P.O. Box 489, Campbellsville, KY 42719
270-465-3757
www.Theophostic.com
What If? Freedom Ministries
Phil and Bobi Naukam founded this ministry to assist others in escaping
the grip of pornography.
P.O. Box 470252, Tulsa, OK 74147-0252
918-249-FREE (3733)
www.WhatIfMinistries.com
Further Reading
Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory
at a Time, by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker with Mike Yorkey,
Waterbrook Press. (This book also contains sections written especially
for the wives of men who struggle with pornography.)
Addicted to "Love," by Stephen Arterburn, Servant
Publications.
Breaking Free: Understanding Sexual Addiction and the Healing Power
of Jesus, by Russell Willingham, InterVarsity Press.
Faithful and True: Sexual Integrity in a Fallen World, by Mark
Laaser, Ph.D., Zondervan.
False Intimacy: Understanding the Struggle of Sex Addiction,
by Dr. Harry Schaumburg, NavPress.
The Final Freedom: Pioneering Sexual Addiction Recovery, by
Douglas Weiss, Ph.D., Heart to Heart Counseling Center.
At the Altar of Sexual Idolatry, by Steve Gallagher, Pure Life
Ministries.
Ordering Your Private World, by Gordon MacDonald, Thomas Nelson
Publishers.
Personal Holiness in Times of Temptation, by Bruce Wilkinson,
Walk Thru the Bible Ministries.
All Scripture is quoted from the New International Version except
as noted.
CBN IS HERE FOR YOU!
Are you seeking answers in life? Are you hurting?
Are you facing a difficult situation?
A caring friend will be there to pray with you in your time of need.
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