Can I Ever Trust Again?
By Tim Wesemann
A broken trust relationship leads to hurt, fear, confusion, and anger. Those feelings are real and reasonable, and you’re now cautious about trusting within close relationships. But by dismissing all close, trusting relationships, you’re also closing the door to great joy and a fullness of life God intends for you.
While situations differ, one truth remains – you live in an imperfect, sinful world. As sinful people, each of us is capable of breaking a trust. In reality, you may not even trust your own decisions, actions, and thoughts. On occasion you may have broken someone else’s trust. We all have. None of us are perfect; we are all sinful.
It isn’t possible for even your closest friends to be totally trustworthy, but someone else is -- Jesus Christ, the Son of God. His love for you is overwhelming and led him to live a perfect life for all of us in this imperfect world. He knows all our sin and need for help. In love, He lived, died, and rose from the dead so all who place their trust in Him have forgiveness of sins and the perfection of heaven. While we have broken our trust relationship with Him, He will never fail us. We can trust Him, His love, His forgiveness, and His help in every situation while we live in a hurting world.
Consider these suggestions/thoughts when you feel disappointed and let down. (Note that some especially difficult situations may necessitate counseling or other assistance.)
- Confirm the facts. Do you have all the facts? Could a misunderstanding or misinformation cost you the relationship? As you learn the facts, calmly share your hurts as well as listen.
- Don’t suppress emotions. Emotions are a gift from God and aren’t sins in and of themselves, but they can lead to sin. For instance, the Bible, God’s true Word, says, “In your anger do not sin.” (Ephesians 4:26) God doesn’t suggest suppressing emotions, only controlling our expression of them.
- Seek wisdom. Pray for discernment in dealing in dealing with future relationship issues. Know God desires to help you make wise decisions.
- Learn to forgive. Too often people wrongly believe when forgiving they’re accepting the sinful act. No sin is right, but every sin can be forgiven. Forgiveness releases the burden and lets you move on, free from the weight of an unforgiving heart. When struggling to forgive, consider your own sins—even your choice not to trust God, who has chosen to offer you full and free forgiveness through his Son, Jesus Christ. From Christ’s act of love, you too can learn to forgive, just as you have been forgiven.
- You can trust again. While trusting makes you vulnerable, if you choose not to trust, you could miss out on so much joy God desires for you. You were created for relationships based on both trust and forgiveness. You may move slower in trusting others, but don’t let fear steal your joy and imprison you in anger and hurt. You can trust again … with God’s help.
As you work through trust issues, remember that even if everyone else fails you, your Savior, Jesus Christ, will not. Trusting in Him and His promises found in the Bible, you can learn to respond to His undeserved love and forgiveness by offering those same gifts in your relationships.
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Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV)
Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. (Colossians 3:12-14 NIV)
Do You Want a Relationship with God?
If you want this kind of relationship with God, pray this prayer right now:
Lord Jesus Christ, I believe that you took the pain of the cross to give me new life. I ask you to come into my life and to give me your peace and joy. I confess that I am a sinner -- that I have gone my own way and have done wrong. Please forgive me for my sins. I receive you now as my Lord and Savior. Please fill me with your Holy Spirit. Help me to follow you and to serve you all my life. Thank you, Lord Jesus. Amen.
If you prayed that prayer, you are now a child of God. The things of your old life have passed away and He has made all things new.
We want to join you in celebrating your new life. Please send us an e-mail to let us know that you prayed to receive Jesus as your Savior. Or you can call our Prayer Counseling Center at (800) 759-0700. A caring friend is available to talk with you and send you some resources to help you begin your walk with the Lord.
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