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A Wandering Heart

Tim allowed porn addiction to escalate to adultery. When his wife Stephanie found out about the infidelity the couple had to decide how they would move forward in their marriage. Read Transcript


IT CONSUMED ME.

IT GAVE ME THAT ODD FEELING OF

PURSUIT.

REPORTER: IT WAS SOMETHING

TIM FELT SECRET, HIS ADDICTION

TO PORNOGRAPHY.

I WAS FILLING A VOID, RIGHT

OR WRONG.

FILLING SOMETHING I NEEDED

FILLED.

REPORTER: IT BEGAN WITH

TEENAGE CURIOSITY AND A

MAGAZINE.

IMAGES SEEKED -- A BOY'S

FASCINATION HAD GROWN INTO AN

ADDICTION FUELLED BY THE

INTERNET.

IT STARTED SLOWLY, IT WAS A

SHORT PERIOD OF TIME, I WAS

SLOWLY ADDICTED.

NO ONE SUSPECTED TIM HAD A

PROBLEM.

HE WAS A CHRISTIAN ACTIVE IN HIS

CHURCH.

HIS WIFE, STEFANI HAD NO IDEA HE

WAS HIDING SOMETHING.

I KNEW WE HAD SOME ISSUES.

I DIDN'T THEY THEY WERE

HORRIFIC.

I THOUGHT WE HAD A PRETTY

HEALTHY MARRIAGE.

REPORTER: TIM TRAVELED WITH

WORK.

THE TRAVEL ALLOWED HIM TO

INDULGE AND ALLOWED HIM TO OPEN

THE DOOR OF THE ATTENTION OF

WOMEN.

HE PURSUED ONE AFFAIR AFTER

ANOTHER.

LATER I WOULD BE ANGRY WITH

MYSELF.

I WOULD.

REPORTER: EVENTUALLY TIM AND

STEFANI HAD CHILDREN, NOTHING

CHANGED.

TIM KNEW IT WAS WRONG.

THE ADDICTION HAD TAKEN OVER.

I WAS SO GONE, I JUST, WHEN

THE DEVIL HAS THAT KIND OF GRIP,

YOU DON'T REALIZE IT.

YOU ARE JUST NUMB.

I WAS NUMB.

REPORTER: ONE DAY TIM WAS

COMFORTED WITH THE TRUTH WHEN A

FRIEND TALKED TO HIM.

TIM'S GUILT WAS OVERWHELMING.

IT WAS WHERE I WAS AT THAT

DAY.

I TOTALLY LOST IT.

I LEFT AND I REMEMBER PRAYING

AND SAYING GOD, I AM DONE.

I AM DONE, DO WHAT YOU WANT.

HE TOOK IT AWAY.

THE ADDICTION WAS GONE.

DESIRE FOR AFFAIRS WAS GONE.

THAT TO ME WAS THE MOST

IMPACTFUL MOMENT OF MY LIFE.

IT WAS SO REAL AND THAT IS WHEN

MY FAITH BECAME REAL.

REPORTER: TIM STILL HAD

STRUGGLES AND CONTINUED CHATTING

ONLINE WITH WOMEN.

EVEN SO HE WORKED ON BEING A

BETTER HUSBAND AND FATHER.

STEFANI NOTICED THE CHANGE BUT

DIDN'T KNOW WHY.

TIM HADN'T CONFESSED HIS

SECRETS.

STEFANI CAME ACROSS A FACEBOOK

ENTRY FROM HER HUSBAND TO A

WOMAN SHE DIDN'T KNOW.

I WAS DEVASTATED.

THAT CONVERSATION SHOULDN'T HAVE

TAKEN PLACE BETWEEN MY HUSBAND

AND SOMEBODY ELSE.

IT WAS CROSSING THE LINE.

IT WAS ABSOLUTE DISGUST FOR

ME.

SHE DIDN'T KNOW THE REST OF THE

STORY.

I WENT TO BED WITH A PIT

KNOWING SOMETHING WAS UP.

SHE KNEW, SOMETHING WAS UP.

SO HARD TO TALK ABOUT.

SO I JUST SPILLED.

WHAT DO YOU DO AT THAT POINT?

I SPILLED AND TOLD HER AND SHE

LEFT.

GOT THE KEYS AND IMMEDIATELY

DROVE TO CHURCH.

I SAT AT CHURCH AND CRIED OUT

FOR HELP AND JUST UM --

THE ONLY HOPE I HAD IS THAT I

KNEW MY WIFE.

I KNEW SHE LOVED ME.

REPORTER: NOW STEFANI KNEW.

I REMEMBER STANDING IN THE

KITCHEN AND TIM SAYING I'LL

RESPECT WHATEVER YOUR DECISION

IS.

I SAID I CAN'T HAVE YOU LEAVE,

YOU NEED TO STAY FOR THE KIDS.

LATER THAT NIGHT OUR PASTOR

SHARED WITH ME, YOU NEED TO

GRIEVE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE.

YOU NEED TO GRIEVE WHAT WAS AND

WHAT YOU HAD AND YOU NEED TO

GRIEVE THE FACT THAT YOUR

MARRIAGE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME

EVER AGAIN.

BUT ALSO UM, HE SAID THE SIMPLE

WORDS OF FORGIVE AS YOU HAVE

BEEN FORGIVEN.

I REMEMBER TELLING HIM, I DON'T

KNOW IF I CAN FORGIVE HIM FOR

THIS.

COUPLE STAYED A PART FOR 10

DAYS.

DURING THAT TIME, STEFANI CAME

TO A REALIZATION THAT AT THE

TIME WAS VERY HARD TO ACCEPT.

IN ORDER FOR ME TO HEAL, I

HAVE TO FORGIVE HIM.

THAT DOESN'T MEAN THE PAIN IS

GONE BUT I CAN START TO HEAL

KNOWING I HAVE GIVEN HIM THAT

AND TOGETHER WE CAN HEAL

TOGETHER.

REPORTER: PATH TO FORGIVENESS

AND REBUILDING TRUST WOULD TAKE

TIME.

HE HAD TO GAIN IT BACK.

BY HIM BEING OPEN AND HONEST,

HERE IS ALL MY PAST WORDS, CHECK

MY E-MAIL, MY FACEBOOK, CHECK

THIS.

ONCE WE WERE ABLE TO DO THAT,

PATH TO RECOVERY WAS RAPID.

SHE ACCEPTED WHERE I WAS.

SHE ACCEPTED IT WASN'T AN ISSUE

BUT I NEEDED ACCOUNTABILITY.

BY HIM BEING HONEST, IT MADE

IT EASIER FOR ME TO TRUST HIM.

REPORTER: HEALING AND

FORGIVENESS COME FROM GOD.

WITHOUT GOD I KNOW WE

WOULDN'T BE SITTING HERE TODAY.

WE WERE TAUGHT THAT CHRIST

HAD TO BE THE CENTER OF THE

HOUSE.

I THINK THAT IS BACKWARDS.

CHRIST HAS TO BE THE CENTER OF

YOUR LIFE AND THE CENTER OF YOUR

WIFE'S LIFE WILL BE DEFAULT BE

THE CENTER OF YOUR HOUSE.

EMBED THIS VIDEO


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