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When Winning Isn't Enough

Elwin was driven to win in all aspects of life, but after tasting defeat in two marriages, and damaging his relationship with his son, he knew he had to relinquish control. Read Transcript


ALL RISE.

Reporter: EDWIN AHU WAS

PROUD TO WEAR THE ROBE OF A

CIRCUIT COURT JUDGE.

AFTER ALL, HE DESERVED IT.

HE WORKED HARD, PLAYED BY

THE RULES, AND WON.

AS AN ATHLETE, HE ALWAYS HAD

A FIERCE DESIRE TO WIN.

AND HE WAS SMART, SMART

ENOUGH TO CRUISE THROUGH

COLLEGE WITH LITTLE EFFORT.

HE EVEN GOT INTO LAW SCHOOL,

BUT THAT'S WHERE THINGS

CHANGED.

I CUT OUT A CLASS.

THE SAME I DID IN

UNDER-GRAD, THINKING I COULD

CARRY ON IN LAW SCHOOL.

Reporter: BUT HE

COULDN'T.

HE FLUNGED A CLASS, AND THE

SCHOOL THREATENED TO DISMISS

HIM.

EDWIN REFUSED TO ACCEPT

FAILURE AND CAME UP WITH A

PLAN.

I FIGURED ON A WAY HOW I

COULD GET THROUGH THESE

CLASSES.

AND I FOUND OUT SEVERAL

RULES AND PRINCIPLES I

NEEDED TO APPLY, AND IT

BECAME A GAME TO ME.

IF I KNOW THE GAME, IF I

KNOW THE RULES, I CAN PASS,

AND I DID.

Reporter: ELWIN

BELIEVED HE COULD APPLY THAT

SAME STRATEGY TO ANY AREA OF

LIFE AND SUCCEED.

HE EVEN MARRIED WHILE IN LAW

SCHOOL JUST TO PROVE IT.

EVERYONE SAID WE WERE TOO

YOUNG.

THE MORE PEOPLE TOLD ME I

COULDN'T DO IT, THAT IT

WOULDN'T BE SUCCESSFUL, THE

COMPETITIVE EDGE KICKED IN

AND I WAS OUT TO PROVE THEM

WRONG.

Reporter: THE DOUBLE

DIVORCED AFTER SEVEN YEARS

AND SHARED CUSTODY OF THEIR

6-YEAR-OLD SON, BRANDON.

ELWIN REFUSED TO ACCEPT ANY

BLAME FOR THE BROKEN

MARRIAGE.

IT'S FAILURE, BUT IT

WASN'T MY FAULT.

I PLAYED BY MY SET OF

RULES.

AND IT WAS HER -- MY

PERCEPTION AT THE TIME, IT

WAS BECAUSE OF WHAT SHE

FAILED TO DO THAT CREATED

THIS BREAKUP.

Reporter: ELWIN'S

PROFESSIONAL LIFE AS A

LITIGATOR WAS SOARING.

HIS DRIVE TO WIN MADE HIM A

POWERHOUSE IN THE

COURTROOM.

I LOVE TRIAL WORK.

TO SEE THE JURY COME TO A

DECISION THAT YOU HAD BEEN

ADVOCATING, EVEN THOUGH YOU

DIDN'T STAND A CHANCE

WALKING THROUGH THAT

COURTROOM.

Reporter: HIS SUCCESS

AS A LAWYER EVENTUALLY

LANDED HIM AN APPOINTMENT AS

A CIRCUIT COURT JUDGE.

HIS PERSONAL LIFE, ON THE

OTHER HAND, WAS A MESS.

HE HAD REMARRIED AND TO A

BLENDED FAMILY.

AND HE WAS DETERMINED TO

MAKE IT WORK HIS WAY.

I STEP IN, KNIGHT IN

SHINING ARMOR, SAVE THE DAY

FOR EVERYONE, PLAY BY MY

RULES.

Reporter: BUT THAT ONLY

CREATED TENSION.

TO MAKE THINGS WORSE, HE

DAMAGED HIS RELATIONSHIP

WITH HIS SON, BRANDON.

HERE I AM, A PERSON WHO

TRIED TO CREATE THE RULES

AND PLAY BY THE RULES, AND

EVEN THOUGH I DID, IS

FALLING APART.

IT WASN'T, LIKE, WHEN I GOT

THE "F" IN LAW SCHOOL.

I COULD COME BACK STRONGER.

THIS TIME I'M GETTING

ANOTHER "F," AND WHAT DO I

DO?

ELWIN DIVORCED AGAIN AND

MOVED IN WITH HIS PARENTS.

I REMEMBER MY DAD SAYING

TO ME ONE DAY, WHAT'S WRONG

WITH YOU, MAN?

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

AND YET YOU'RE LIVING AT

HOME AGAIN.

AND I JUST BEGAN WONDERING

WONDERING.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE

WORLD?

AND I COULDN'T PUT MY FINGER

ON IT.

Reporter: ONE

AFTERNOON, WHILE STUCK IN A

HONOLULU TRAGIC JAM, ELWIN

WAS LISTENING TO A RECORDED

CEREMONY A FRIEND HAD GIVEN

HIM.

HE LIKED THE MESSAGE SO

MUCH, HE DECIDED TO VISIT

THE CHURCH.

WHEN THE WORSHIP WAS

DONE, AS THE PASTOR STARTED

TO SPEAK, IT WAS AS IF THE

ROOM JUST EMPTIED, AND THERE

WAS NOBODY THERE.

IT WAS LIKE IT WAS JUST ME.

I THOUGHT, THIS IS INSANE.

Reporter: THE

EXPERIENCE STAYED WITH HIM,

SO HE WENT BACK.

HE STILL REMEMBERS WHAT THE

PASTOR SAID.

HE SAID GOD MAY HAVE

ORCHESTRATED EVERY MOMENT IN

YOUR LIFE FOR YOU TO BE HERE

TO RECEIVE THE FORGIVENESS

OF JESUS CHRIST.

WHOA!

THAT EXPLODED.

BECAUSE FOR THE VERY FIRST

TIME I CAME TO REALIZE THAT

IT WASN'T ANYONE ELSE WHO

WAS WRONG.

IT WAS ME.

THAT I NEEDED FORGIVENESS.

Reporter: ELWIN

REALIZED THAT FORGIVENESS

COMES THROUGH JESUS CHRIST.

HE ALSO FELT HE NEEDED TO

SET SOME THINGS RIGHT.

I NEEDED TO NOT ONLY

RECEIVE FORGIVENESS FROM THE

LORD, BUT TO GO AND ASK FOR

FORGIVENESS FROM MY TWO

EX-WIVES.

AND THAT WAS AN INTERESTING

JOURNEY.

Reporter: HE ALSO ASKED

HIS SON, BRANDON, TO FORGIVE

HIM.

BECAUSE HE FELT LIKE HE HAD

FAILED HIM AS A FATHER.

BUT ELWIN SAYS GOD HAD

ALREADY BEEN AT WORK IN

BRANDON'S HEART.

AND I CAN STILL HEAR HIS

VOICE.

HE SAID, I LOVE YOU.

ALL IS FORGIVEN.

LET'S START OVER.

AND TO ME, IF GOD CAN DO

THAT, THEN GOD CAN DO

ANYTHING.

Reporter: FOR TWO AND A

HALF YEARS, ELWIN CONTINUED

SERVING IN THE CIRCUIT

COURT.

HE REMARRIED.

AND HE AND HIS WIFE FELT IT

WAS TIME TO LEAVE THE

COURT.

AND TODAY HE PASTORS A

CHURCH WITH HIS SON,

BRANDON.

ONE OF THE BIGGEST THINGS

GOD HAS TOLD ME THROUGHOUT

THIS ENTIRE JOURNEY IS THAT

LIFE IS NOT ABOUT ME.

ABOUT THE PARADOX OF DYING

TO SELF BEFORE YOU CAN

LIVE.

THAT LED ME TO REALIZE THAT,

YOU KNOW, SUCCESS IS NOT

NECESSARILY ABOUT WHERE YOU

ARE, THE POSITION YOU HOLD,

THE MONEY YOU MAKE.

LIFE IS MORE ABOUT

SIGNIFICANCE AND HOW YOU CAN

CRIBILITCONTRIBUTE NOW TO

SOMEONE ELSE'S LIFE.

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