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700 Club Interactive: Salvaging My Identity - March 6, 2015

Author and speaker Rachel Lovingood helps people through an identity crisis. Read Transcript


Gordon: SHE WAS 5' 5,"

WEIGHED 78 POUNDS, AND FELT

FAT.

I HAD EXTREMELY LOW

SELF-ESTEEM, AND NEVER FELT

GOOD ENOUGH, SMART ENOUGH,

OR PRETTY ENOUGH.

Gordon: FIND OUT HOW

SHE FOUND HER TRUE WORTH AND

TODAY'S "700 CLUB

INTERACTIVE."

ON "700 CLUB INTERACTIVE,"

WE USE TECHNOLOGY TO PRAY

FOR EACH OTHER AND EXPLORE

TOPICS THAT MATTER TO YOU.

WATCH WHAT GOD IS DOING IN

THE WORLD TODAY.

WELL, WELCOME TO THE SHOW.

WE OBESITY ON THE RISE, MANY

AMERICANS FIND THEMSELVES

OBSESSED ABOUT THEIR

WEIGHT.

FOR THE GIRL YOUR ABOUT TO

MEET, BEING SKINNY MEANT

EVERYTHING, NO MATTER WHAT

THE COST.

Terry: NO MATTER HOW

MUCH WEIGHT SHE LOST, ANDREA

LOGAN SAW A FAT GIRL IN THE

MIRROR.

WHILE THAT INSPIRED HER TO

LOSE MORE WEIGHT, IT WAS THE

MESSAGE IN A CAR WINDOW THAT

CHANGED HER LIFE.

I NEVER FELT I WAS GOOD

ENOUGH, SMART ENOUGH, PRETTY

ENOUGH.

Reporter: FROM HER

EARLIEST MEMORIES, ANDREA

LOGAN FELT INVISIBLE.

SHE WAS HUNGRY FOR AFFECTION

AND ATTENTION.

MY FATHER WAS A POLICE

OFFICER.

AND MY MOTHER, YOU KNOW,

STARTED WORKING QUITE OFTEN

AT FULL-TIME JOBS.

WE GREW UP IN A VERY

EMOTIONALLY STERILE

ENVIRONMENT.

THERE WAS NOT A LOT OF

AFFECTION OR ATTENTION.

Reporter: WHEN ANDREA

TURNED 13 YEARS OLD, HER

PARENTS DIVORCED AND HER

GRANDPARENTS DIED.

I REALLY WAS HOPELESS.

I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH

DEPRESSION AT 13, AND I WAS

THREATENING SUICIDE BECAUSE

I WAS SO DESPERATE TO HAVE

SOMEBODY PAY ATTENTION TO ME

AND TO LOVE ON ME.

Reporter: WHEN ANDREA'S

CRIES FOR HELP WERE IGNORED,

SHE REALIZED BY CONTROLLING

HER EATING HABITS, SHE COULD

TAKE CHARGE OF HER LIFE.

GOING INTO HIGH SCHOOL IS

WHEN THE EATING DISORDER

STARTED BECAUSE MY LIFE WAS

A MESS.

SO I STARTED TO CONTROL MY

ENVIRONMENT.

IF I CAN JUST DO THIS ONE

THING AND BE STRONG IN THIS

AREA, THEN I'LL BE

DIFFERENT.

AND I THINK THAT WAS THE ONE

THING THAT MADE ME, ODDLY

ENOUGH, FEEL STRONG.

Reporter: SOON ANOREXIA

CONSUMED ANDREA'S LIFE.

I REMEMBER AT THE WORST

POINT OF THE EATING

DISORDER, I THINK I WAS

EATING 500 CALORIES OR

LESS.

SO I WOULD COUNT EVERY STICK

OF GUM, AND EVERYTHING I

WOULD PUT IN MY MOUTH.

EVEN WITH 78 POUNDS,

85 POUNDS, 90 POUNDS, I

WOULD SEE A FAT, UGLY

PERSON.

I WAS ALIVE, BUT I WAS SO

DEAD INSIDE AND SO BROKEN.

AND IT WAS JUST

ALL-CONSUMING.

THE OBSESSION, THE

COMPULSION, AND IT TAKES

EVERY PART OF YOUR LIFE AWAY

FROM YOU.

Reporter: WHEN SHE WAS

18, ANDREA WENT TO AN

OUTPATIENT FACILITY FOR TWO

WEEKS TO GET HELP.

BUT SHORTLY AFTER THE

TREATMENT ENDED, ANDREA

MOVED TO LOS ANGELES TO

PURSUE HER DREAM OF ACTING.

THE ANOREXIA WAS NOT FAR

BEHIND.

I WAS AROUND SEX AND

DRUGS, AND IT BECAME NORMAL

TO ME, AND THAT WAS SCARY.

I WAS RELAPSING TO THE

ANOREXIA BECAUSE I HAD,

AGAIN, NO SUPPORT AND NO

FOUNDATION BECAUSE I WAS

LOOKING AT PEOPLE WITH

PLASTIC SURGERY, AND LOOKING

AT WHAT APPEARED TO BE THE

PERFECT LIFE AESTHETICALLY.

Reporter: AFTER A

COUPLE OF YEARS IN

HOLLYWOOD, THE COMPETITION

FOR JOBS AND FEAR OF

REJECTION BEGAN TO WEAR ON

ANDREA.

THAT'S WHEN SHE STARTED

WORKING A SIDE JOB AS A

PERSONAL TRAINER.

SEVERAL OF HER CLIENTS WERE

CHRISTIANS.

I WAS EXHAUSTED

PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY, AND

SPIRITUALLY.

I WAS AT THAT PLACE WHERE MY

EYES WERE OPEN.

I WAS READY FOR IT.

AND I STARTED SEEING THE JOY

AND THE PEACE THAT THESE

OTHER CHRISTIANS I WAS

WORKING WITH HAD, AND I

COULD SEE THE DIFFERENCE IN

THEIR LIVES.

Reporter: DRIVING HOME

FROM WORK ONE DAY, ANDREA

PRAYED TO GOD WHEN SHE

STOPPED AT A LIGHT.

I GOT TO ROCK BOTTOM, AND

I REMEMBER CRYING OUT TO GOD

IN MY CAR.

I WAS SOBBING.

SOMEBODY HAD PEEPED THEIR

HORN, SO I HESITATED TO EVEN

LOOK OVER, AND HE HELD UP A

SIGN AND HE POINTED TO IT.

IT WAS THE SIGN TO A RADIO

STATION.

I TURNED THE RADIO STATION

ON, AND THERE WAS A PASTOR

REPEATING THE PRAYER I HAD

JUST CRIED OUT.

GOD USED THAT AND IT WAS

REPEATING MY WORDS AND MY

CRY OUT TO GOD RIGHT BACK TO

HIM.

THAT WAS A HUGE SIGN, NOT

ONLY PHYSICALLY, BUT JUST

SYMBOLICLY, OF GOD SAYING,

LISTEN, YOU'RE HERE FOR A

REASON.

I HAVE A PLAN FOR YOU.

I AM HERE.

AND I AM REAL.

AND REALLY THAT'S WHEN MY

LIFE MADE A DRAMATIC

CHANGE.

AND I ACCEPTED CHRIST AS MY

SAVIOR.

I JUST REMEMBER FEELING THAT

PEACE AND THAT JOY AND

KNOWING THAT IT WAS REAL.

Reporter: IN 2003,

ANDREA MARRIED DAVID WHITE,

A MAN SHE MET AT HER

CHURCH.

BUT ANDREA CONTINUED TO

STRUGGLE WITH EATING

DISORDERS, EVEN AFTER

BECOMING A CHRISTIAN AND

MARRIAGE.

SHORTLY AFTER HER WEDDING,

SHE SLIPPED INTO BULEMIA.

THE ANOREXIA, I THOUGHT,

I'M A NEW CREATURE AND I'M

HEALED.

BUT WE STILL HAVE THE

EMOTIONAL WOUNDS AND THE

SOUL WOUNDS.

I THINK BEING A CHRISTIAN

AND LEARNING YOUR IDENTITY,

IT'S ONGOING.

FOR TWO YEARS STRAIGHT, MY

HUSBAND AND I WERE ON OUR

KNEES AND CRYING OUT TO

GOD.

AS A BELIEVER, ASKING GOD

FOR HIS MERCY.

Reporter: THROUGH

CONSISTENT PRAYER AND BIBLE

STUDY, ANDREA BEGAN TO SEE A

BREAKTHROUGH.

GOD IS SO GOOD.

WHEN HE HEALS, HE HEALS YOU

AND THEN SOME.

HE HEALED ME OF BULEMIA IN

AN INSTANT.

I STOPPED THROWING UP.

IT WAS A MIRACLE.

Reporter: DOCTORS HAD

TOLD HER SHE WOULD NEVER GET

PREGNANT BECAUSE OF THE

RAVAGES OF ANOREXIA.

WHEN SHE BECAME PREGNANT

WITH HER FIRST SON, SHE KNEW

HER HEALING WAS COMPLETE.

HE NOT ONLY HEALED ME OF

BULEMIA, BUT HE BLESSED ME

WITH A STRONG, HEALTHY

CHILD.

I FEEL LIKE I GOT A DOUBLE

HEALING.

Reporter: TODAY ANDREA

HAS TWO HEALTHY CHILDREN AND

HAS BEEN LIVING FREE OF HER

EATING DISORDER FOR SIX AND

A HALF YEARS.

SHE WORKS ALONGSIDE HER

HUSBAND IN THEIR BUSINESS.

SINCE I'VE BEEN SAVED,

99% OF MY WORK HAS BEEN IN A

CHRISTIAN MARKET.

IT HAS JUST BEEN SUCH A

BLESSING TO DO A STORY, TO

HAVE HEART IN IT AND TO ALSO

HAVE REDEMPTION IN IT.

HE IS FAITHFUL EVERY TIME HE

SEES YOU, WHETHER IT IS

ANOREXIA OR BULEMIA OR

DEPRESSION.

HE IS RIGHT THERE TO CRADLE

YOU.

I'M TELLING YOU, HE WILL NOT

LET YOU DOWN.

I WOULD SAY CRY OUT TO HIM

AND BE RELENTLESS.

Gordon: YOU CAN DO

THAT, TOO.

YOU CAN CRY OUT TO HIM AND

YOU CAN BE RELENTLESS.

UNTIL YOU FIND YOURSELF IN

HIM.

WE DON'T KNOW WHO WE ARE

UNTIL WE SEE OUR IDENTITY IN

HIM.

IT IS HIS PRAYER OVER US

THAT WE WOULD BE ONE, THAT

HE WOULD BE IN HUS US, JUST

AS HE IS IN THE FATHER.

THAT WE WOULD HAVE HIS

MIND.

WE WOULD HAVE HIS SPIRIT.

WE WOULD FINALLY KNOW WHO WE

ARE.

GOD HAD A GREAT PLAN FOR

US.

AND IN THAT PLAN WE WERE

SUPPOSED TO LIVE IN A

GARDEN.

AND HE WOULD COME DOWN IN

THE COOL OF THE EVENING AND

TALK WITH US FACE TO FACE.

THAT WAS HIS IDEA.

THAT WAS HIS DREAM.

WE MESSED THAT UP.

WE WENT OUR OWN WAY.

AND THROUGH THE KNOWLEDGE OF

GOOD AND EVIL WE STARTED

JUDGING EVERYTHING AROUND

US, ESPECIALLY OURSELVES.

AND PSYCHOLOGISTS TELL US

THIS: THEY SAY OUR

SELF-TALK, WHAT WE SAY TO

OURSELVES, 80% OF IT IS

NEGATIVE.

SO WHEN YOU LOOK AT ANDREA'S

STORY, REALIZE YOU'RE

LOOKING AT YOURSELF.

HOW OFTEN IN THE MIRROR HAVE

YOU EXPRESSED YOUR

DISPLEASURE WITH HOW YOU

LOOK OR HOW MUCH YOU WEIGH

OR WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

THAT WAS NEVER GOD'S IDEA.

GOD'S IDEA WAS THAT WE WOULD

LOOK AT HIM, FACE TO FACE.

AND IN THAT SEE THAT WE'RE

MADE IN HIS IMAGE.

NOW, THE GOOD NEWS IS GOD

HASN'T GIVEN UP ON HIS

DREAM.

HE HASN'T GIVEN UP ON HIS

DREAM FOR YOU.

AND JUST LIKE ANDREA, YOU

CAN BE RESTORED.

YOU CAN BE HEALED.

YOU CAN BE SET FREE.

YOU CAN BE WHAT YOU WERE

ALWAYS INTENDED TO BE.

YOU CAN COME HOME.

IF YOU NEED PRAYER, IF YOU

NEED SOME ASSURANCE THAT GOD

LOVES YOU, WE'RE HERE FOR

YOU.

WE'RE NOT HERE TO CONDEMN

YOU.

WE'RE NOT HERE TO JUDGE

YOU.

WE'RE HERE TO TELL YOU GOD

LOVES YOU, AND HE HAS A PLAN

AND A PURPOSE FOR YOUR

LIFE.

IF YOU WANT SOMEONE TO PRAY

WITH, GIVE US A CALL.

1-800-759-0700.

1-888-777-1999.

TERRY?

Terry: WELL, LATER IN

THE SHOW, WE'LL BE PRAYING

FOR YOU AND YOUR NEEDS.

BUT FIRST, A QUESTION THAT

HAS PLAGUED A GENERATION.

IT IS A CRISIS.

IT HAS BECOME AN OBJECT OF

FIX SATIONATION AND IT IS

EVERY GIRL'S AND GUY'S

QUESTION: WHO AM I.

Terry: WE'LL TALK ABOUT

SALVAGING YOUR IDENTITY,

AFTER THIS.

Terry: IN A WORLD THAT

IS CONSTANTLY BOMBARDING US

WITH HYPERSEXUALIZATION,

MANY WOMEN FEEL TRAPPED,

LEAVING THEM STUCK IN A

CONFUSING GAME OF IDENTITY

CHARADES.

IT IS A CRISIS, A PROBLEM

THAT PLAGUES OUR

GENERATION.

IT IS EVERY GIRL'S AND GUY'S

FRUSTRATION: WHO AM I?

WHAT IS MY IDENTITY?

WE TRY TO FIND IT IN

DIFFERENT PLACES BECAUSE OUR

HEART IS FILLED WITH EMPTY

SPACES.

WE TRY TO FIND IT IN OUR

RELATIONSHIPS WITH OUR

FRIENDS, OR MAYBE ROMANTIC

THINGS WE SWEAR WILL NEVER

END.

OR WEARING THE RIGHT CLOTHES

AND TRYING TO BE COOL.

OUR PLAYING SPORTS AND BEING

THE BEST JOCK.

GIRLS STRIVING FOR A SIZE 2,

INSTEAD OF REALIZING WHAT

GOD SEES IN YOU.

SEE ALL OF THOSE THINGS

WON'T FILL THAT HOLE.

IN FACT, THOUGH WORLDLY

THINGS WILL TAKE THEIR

TOLL.

THE WORLD'S IDENTITY LEAVES

YOU STRIVING FOR SOMETHING

UNREAL, AND YOU BECOME STUCK

IN THIS IMPOSSIBLE IDEAL.

BUT, LISTEN, HERE IS WHAT'S

REAL: ALL THE THINGS THE

WORLD SAYS YOU ARE, ARE

UNREAL.

GENESIS 1: 27, TELL US WE'RE

MADE IN THE IMAGINE OF GOD.

ALPHA, OMEGA, THE BEGINNING

AND THE END, THE ONE WHO

FORMED US OUT OF DUST AND

HAND, AND WHO SITS THERE

WITH YOU IN THE PALM OF HIS

HAND.

GOD SAYS YOU ARE THE SALT OF

THE EARTH.

GOD SAYS HE HAS KNOWN YOUR

PLANS SINCE YOUR VERY

BIRTH.

GOD SAYS YOU'RE SEATED ON

THE RIGHT SIDE WITH CHRIST.

GOD SAYS YOU'RE A

WORKMANSHIP, A BEAUTIFUL

CREATION.

GOD SAYS YOU HAVE THE POWER

TO BE A FORCE FOR HIM, TO

CHANGE NATIONS.

GOD SAYS YOU'RE NOTHING

WITHOUT HIM.

GOD SAYS WE'RE THE LIGHT IN

THE WORLD SO DIM.

GOD SAYS W HE IS LIMITLESS,

AND WE HAVE ACCESS TO THAT

POWER.

GOD SAYS YOUR PRECIOUS TO

BOTH ME AND MY SON.

GOD HAS TOLD YOU YOUR

IDENTITY.

IT IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR

FACE.

TOP SETTLING FOR THE WORLD'S

DEFINITION IN ITS PLACE.

I KNOW WHO I AM.

I KNOW WHO I AM.

I KNOW WHO I AM.

I AM WHO GOD SAYS I AM.

Terry: JOINING US NOW

TO TALK ABOUT THE ISSUE OF

"WHO AM I" IS SPEAKER AND

AUTHOR RACHEL LOVINGOD.

I HAVE FOUR DAUGHTERS, AND

I'M SO THANKFUL I'M NOT

GOING UP IN THE WORLD

TODAY.

WHY DO YOU THINK WOMEN

STRUGGLE SO MUCH WITH

IDENTITY CRISIS?

PROBABLY BECAUSE WHAT YOU

SAID, THE WORLD HAS CHANGED

SO MUCH.

AND WE'RE CONSTANTLY

BOMBARDED WITH THE MEDIA

MESSAGES THAT WE'RE NOT

PRETTY ENOUGH, WE'RE NOT

SMART ENOUGH, WE'RE NOT TALL

ENOUGH, WE'RE NOT ENOUGH.

IT FEEDS IN TO THE WHOLE

COMPULSION WE HAVE, TO RACE

AROUND LOOKING FOR MEANING.

AND WE KNOW AS BELIEVERS,

WE'LL NEVER FIND TRUE

MEANING APART FROM CHRIST.

BUT THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED,

AND PEOPLE WILL TRY

EVERYTHING.

Terry: AND BEFORE YOU

KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT THAT,

YOU BUY THE LIE.

IT IS SO EASY, IT SEEMS.

WHEN YOU LOOK AT IT, LIFE'S

CIRCUMSTANCE HAPPENS.

IF YOU DON'T KNOW GOD AND

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HIS

PLAN AND HIS PURPOSE FOR

YOU, YOU'RE KIND OF A PAWN

IN THE GAME.

AND THE ENEMY IS THE

FATHER OF LOVE.

WE BUY INTO IT BECAUSE DO

YOU KNOW HOW MUCH EASIER IT

IS TO BELIEVE THE LIES THAN

IT IS TO BELIEVE THE TRUTH?

Terry: YES.

WHY IS THAT?

I DON'T KNOW.

BUT MAYBE IT GOES TO WHAT WE

HEARD EARLIER IN ANDREA'S

STORY, AND WHAT GORDON WAS

TALKING ABOUT, HOW SO MANY

OF THE MESSAGES IN OUR MINDS

ARE NEGATIVE.

IT WAS KIND OF AN ALARMING

STATISTIC, 80%.

AND IT IS NOT JUST

NON-BELIEVERS WHO BELIEVE

THE LIE.

IT IS BELIEVERS, TOO.

PART OF THAT IS BECAUSE THEY

DON'T KNOW THE TRUTH.

THEY HAVE NOT SAT DOWN AND

UNDERSTOOD THAT POWERFUL

SPOKEN WORD, WHERE SHE WAS

NAMING ALL OF THOSE THINGS

THAT GOD SAID TO US.

THAT'S GOOD STUFF.

Terry: YOU WERE MARRIED

YOUNG.

YES.

Terry: AND AFTER YOU

WERE MARRIED, YOUR HUSBAND

BECAME A PASTOR.

WOW, THAT'S A ROLE FOR A

WOMAN THAT CAN BE VERY

DEMANDING.

HOW DID YOU HANDLE THAT?

IT WAS A LITTLE

SHOCKING.

I WAS 20 YEARS OLD WHEN I

GOT MARRIED.

I'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 27

YEARS NOW.

BUT 27 YEARS AGO WAS 20 AND

WE GOT MARRIED, AND JEFF WAS

ALREADY IN SEMINARY.

Terry: DID YOU HAVE ANY

IDEA WHAT YOU WERE WALKERING

INTO?

NO, AND NOBODY TOLD ME.

I'M GLAD I DIDN'T KNOW

BECAUSE I KIND OF GOT TO

FIGURE IT OUT.

ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU'RE ON

STAFF AT A CHURCH, AND IT IS

KIND OF, LIKE, OH, MY

GOODNESS, WE'RE THE

LEADERS.

AND I WAS LOOKING AROUND FOR

THE GROWN-UPS.

Terry: AND SO MUCH

EXPECTATION?

EXACTLY.

AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE

IDEAL MINISTER'S WIFE IS

SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE.

SO I WENT TO HIGH WHO I

THOUGHT IT WAS THE BEST,

ANDREA DUNCAN, AND I

THOUGHT, I'M NOWHERE NEAR AS

GOOD AS HER.

AND SHE PLAYS PIANO AND

MAKES COOKIES, AND I JUST

PLAY COOKIES.

AND GOD SPOKE A WORD IN MY

HEAD.

HE SAID, I DIDN'T CALL YOU

TO BE THE ANDREA.

I CALLED YOU TO BE RACHEL.

AND YOU'RE THE ONE MARRIED

TO JEFF.

AND SHE ISN'T.

YOU'RE JUST SUPPOSED TO BE

THE BEST YOU YOU CAN BE.

AND THAT WAS THE BEST

FREEING MOMENT, KNOWING THAT

GOD KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING

AND HE DIDN'T CREATE ME TO

TURN ME INTO SOMEONE ELSE.

Terry: YOU HAVE WRITTEN

A BOOK, "SASALVAGING

IDENTITY," , WHICH HAS

IDENTITY," WHICH HAS BEEN

OUT FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

AND THIS IS LAID OUT SO

INTERESTING.

AND YOU SAID IT IS NOT

REALLY A JOURNAL, BUT IT IS

AN EXPERIENCE.

IT IS A 40-DAY

EXPERIENCE, AND THE REASON

WE DID THAT IS BECAUSE WE

REALLY, REALLY BELIEVE

ROMANS 12: 1-2: "DON'T BE

CONFORMED TO HIS WORLD, BUT

BE TRANSFORMED BY THE

RENEWING OF YOUR MIND."

AND EVEN THOUGH WE KNOW

THAT, WE GO I SHOULD BELIEVE

WHAT GOD'S WORD SAYS ABOUT

ME, BUT IT IS NOT ENOUGH

JUST TO MAKE A STATEMENT.

TRANSFORMATION HAPPENS BY

RENEWING OUR MINDS, AND

RENEWING OUR MINDS HAPPENS

OVERTIME.

WE DIDN'T WANT TO THROW A

BOOK OUT THERE FOR YOU TO

READ AND GO, YEAH, YEAH,

THAT'S GOOD.

WE WANTED TO GIVE YOU AN

OPPORTUNITY TO WALK THROUGH

SCRIPTURE DAY AFTER DAY

AFTER DAY.

Terry: YOU REALLY HAVE

TO SLOW IT DOWN, THE WHOLE

LIFE PROCESS THING, AND

BREAK IT APART, LIKE YOU DO

IN THIS BOOK.

AND THEN REALLY TAKE IT FOR

YOURSELF.

YOU TALK ABOUT JUNK IN THIS

BOOK.

TALK A LITTLE BIT ABOUT

THAT.

IT'S A FUN CONCEPT

BECAUSE WE'RE KIND OF THAT

TRASH TO TREASURE, THE HGTV

THINGS.

IT IS 40 DAYS OF JUNK.

AND THE JUNK IS THE STUFF

THAT THE ENEMY CONTINUES TO

FEED US THAT WILL MAR OR

IMAGE, AND MAKES IT LOOK IN

THE MIRROR AND SEE A

DISTORTED IMAGE.

I SAW SOMETHING ON BULLYING

THIS MORNING ON YOUR LOCAL

NEWS HERE, WORRY, ANXIETY,

FEAR, ACCEPTANCE, PEER

PRESSURE -- ALL OF THOSE

THINGS ARE JUNK THAT THE

ENEMY KEEPS GIVING US.

Terry: WHAT DO YOU WANT

PEOPLE TO TAKE AWAY FROM

WHEN THEY READ "SALVAGING MY

IDENTITY?"

WE WANT THEM TO SEE THAT

GOD SAYS ALL OF THESE

POWERFUL, WONDERFUL THINGS

ABOUT THEM, AND WHEN YOU

REALLY BELIEVE AND ARE

CHANGED BY THE TRUTH, THAT

YOU'LL KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

AND 1 PETER: 5, 8, AND 9, IT

SAYS BE SERIOUS AND BE

ALERT.

WE NEED TO TAKE OUR FAITH

SERIOUSLY, AND OURSELVES

LESS SERIOUSLY.

CHRISTIANITY HAS NEVER BEEN

A LABEL THAT WE WEAR.

IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN SUPPOSED

TO BE OUR LIFESTYLE.

IF WE'LL BE SERIOUS AND

ALERT AND STAND FIRM AGAINST

THE ENEMY, GOD WILL DO DO

EXTREMELY AND ABUNDANTLY

THAN ANYTHING WE COULD

IMAGINE.

Terry: SOME OF YOU ARE

PROBABLY RELATING TO THE

STORY WE HAD SEEN BEFORE AND

THE THINGS WE'VE TALKED

ABOUT.

IF YOU LIKE TO LEARN ABOUT

RACHEL'S BOOK, IT IS

AVAILABLE WHEREVER BOOKS ARE

SOLD.

AND SHE HAS ANOTHER ONE

AROUND THE CORNER.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

THANK YOU.

MY PLEASURE.

Terry: GORDON?

Gordon: COMING UP,

MISS AMERICA 2007.

ON THE OUTSIDE, IT WAS

LITERALLY A DREAM COME

TRUE.

BUT ON THE INSIDE, IT WAS

PROBABLY THE LONELIEST TIME

IN MY LIFE.

Gordon: ONE FORMER

WINNER TALKS ABOUT THE COST

OF THE CROWN, WHEN WE COME

BACK.

Gordon: THE WOMEN WHO

WEAR THE MISS AMERICA CROWN

GET WISKED AWAY ON A

YEAR-LONG A ADVENTURE, AND

LOG MORE THAN 20,000 TRAVEL

MILES A MONTH.

SO IT IS NO SURPRISE AFTER

LAUREN NELSON WON THE CROWN

IN 2007, SHE THOUGHT IT WAS

A DREAM COME TRUE.

YET IT BECAME ONE SHE

DESPERATELY WANTED TO WAKE

UP FROM.

THE NEW MISS AMERICA IS

MISS OKLAHOMA!

IT WAS SO EXCITING.

BECAUSE I HAD WORKED SO HARD

FOR THIS GOAL AND FOR THIS

DREAM.

BUT IT WAS SO SCARY AT THE

SAME TIME.

I SET IT AS MY GOAL AND I

WANTED IT, AND I WANTED TO

BE MISS AMERICA, AND I WAS

LIVING THAT DREAM.

Reporter: LAUREN NELSON

WAS RAISED IN OKLAHOMA,

WHERE SHE LIVED A SIMPLE

LIFE WITH HER FAMILY.

IN SCHOOL, SHE DEVELOPED A

KNACK FOR BEING ON STAGE.

PERFORMING IN THE SHOW

CHOIR OR MUSICALS.

I LOVED THAT KIND OF RUSH OF

JUST, LIKE, LIVE

PERFORMANCE.

Reporter: FOR LAUREN,

THE STAGE GAVE HER A PLACE

TO SHINE.

I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE THE

POPULAR KID.

I WANTED PEOPLE TO LIKE ME.

SO I THINK I DID A LOT BASE

MY CONFIDENCE ON IF PEOPLE

WERE HAPPY WITH ME OR NOT

HAPPY WITH ME.

Reporter: SHE NEVER

THOUGHT ABOUT BEING IN

BEAUTY PAGEANTS UNTIL HIGH

SCHOOL, WHEN SOME FRIENDS

TALKED HER INTO ENDING ONE.

> ENTERING ONE.

PAGEANTS DEFINITELY FEED

YOUR EGO.

ESPECIALLY AFTER YOU HAVE

WON A TITLE.

AND THERE IS A CIRCLE OF

PEOPLE WHO MAKE IT ALL ABOUT

YOU.

JUST PEOPLE SAYING, YOU'RE

GOING TO WIN AND YOU'RE THE

BEST.

Reporter: LAUREN BECAME

MISS OKLAHOMA AND SET HER

SIGHTS ON THE MISS AMERICA

TITLE.

I FOUND MY TOTAL IDENTITY

IN BEING MISS OKLAHOMA,

FIRST OF ALL BEING

SUCCESSFUL AND PEOPLE

THOUGHT I WAS GOOD ENOUGH.

JUST TO KNOW PEOPLE I DIDN'T

KNOW, THOSE JUDGES, HAD

JUDGED ME ALL WEEK AND

THOUGHT, SHE IS WORTHY OF

THAT.

Reporter: HER HARD WORK

PAID OFF WHEN SHE WON THE

2007 MISS AMERICA PAGEANT.

IT WAS A DREAM COME TRUE,

BUT LAUREN SOON REALIZED SHE

CARRIED A HEAVY BURDEN.

PEOPLE WANTED TO MEET

MISS AMERICA.

THEY DIDN'T REALLY WANT TO

KNOW LAUREN.

ON THE OUTSIDE, IT WAS

LITERALLY A DREAM COME

TRUE.

BUT ON THE INSIDE, BEHIND

THE SCENES, IT WAS PROBABLY

THE LONELIEST TIME IN MY

LIFE.

Reporter: AS THE YEAR

WENT ON, LAUREN BEGAN TO

HAVE A CHANGE OF HEART.

WHEN I REALLY STARTED TO

GET TO GO TO CHILDREN'S

HOSPITALS AND SEE KIDS, AND

ACTUALLY SEE THAT

MISS AMERICA CAN MAKE AN

IMPACT AND CAN INSPIRE AND

BRIGHTEN SOMEBODY'S DAY.

THOSE WERE THE PARTS I JUST

LOVED.

Reporter: AFTER HER

REIGN ENDED, LAUREN HAD TO

PREPARE FOR THE NEXT PHASE

OF HER LIFE.

THE BEGINNING OF MY YEAR

I WAS CRYING BECAUSE I WAS

TOO SCARED TO DO IT, AND AT

THE END I WAS BOO-HOOING

BECAUSE I WANTED TO DO

ANOTHER YEAR.

I THOUGHT, WHAT IS LIFE

AFTER MISS AMERICA.

I'M 21, AND I HOPE I HAVEN'T

PEAKED.

Reporter: ON THE FLIGHT

HOME, LAUREN RAN INTO A

REPORTER, ROBIN MARSH.

OVER A CUP OF COFFEE, THE

TWO STARTED A FRIENDSHIP.

IN TIME, ROBIN SPOKE TO

LAUREN ABOUT JESUS.

SHE INVITED ME TO GO TO

CHURCH WITH HER AND HER

FAMILY.

SHE ASKED ME TO DO A BIBLE

STUDY IN HER HOME WITH HER.

I REALLY SAW IN ROBIN'S LIFE

HER LIVING OUT THIS

RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS.

AND I SAW THE DIFFERENCE

THAT IT MADE IN HER LIFE.

AND I THOUGHT, I WANT WHAT

THEY'VE GOT.

AND I NEED WHAT THEY'VE

GOT.

Reporter: THAT'S WHEN

LAUREN MADE A DECISION.

I REMEMBER GOING IN FRONT

OF THE CHURCH, JUST BROKEN.

IT WAS THAT DAY THAT I FULLY

SURRENDERED EVERYTHING TO

HIM.

THAT WAS THE DAY HE TOOK ALL

OF MY SHAME AND ALL OF MY

GUILT, AND I FELT TRUE

FORGIVENESS.

Reporter: TODAY LAUREN

IS NOW MARRIED AND SPEAKS TO

AUDIENCES ABOUT HER TIME AS

MISS AMERICA, AND FINDING

HER TRUE IDENTITY IN

CHRIST.

MY IDENTITY IS FOUND IN

WHO JESUS SAYS I AM NOW,

INSTEAD OF WHAT EVERYBODY

ELSE THINKS OF ME.

BECAUSE THAT OPINION CHANGES

ALL THE TIME.

BUT GOD'S OPINION OF ME

NEVER CHANGESC CHANGES.

Gordon: TERRY MEEUWSEN

HAS BEEN -- YOU LIVED THIS.

Terry: YES, I DID LIVE

THAT.

Gordon: AND WHAT DID

YOU THINK WOULD YO WHAT SHE

WENT THROUGH?

Terry: I THINK THAT

EVERYTHING SHE SAID IS VERY

TRUE FOR MANY OF US.

I REMEMBER AFTER ALL OF THE

HARD WORK AND ALL OF THE

EFFORT PUT INTO IT, WHEN YOU

WALK DOWN THAT RUNWAY WITH

THE CROWN AND YOU LOOK OUT,

AND EVERYBODY IS OUT THERE

AND YOU ARE ALONE, AND YOU

REALIZE, WOW, I MEAN, THIS

IS A WONDERFUL OPPORTUNITY

BUT I'M GOING TO WALK THIS

ROAD ALONE.

IT IS A VERY LONG, LONELY

YEAR.

A WONDERFUL YEAR.

A YEAR OF TREMENDOUS

OPPORTUNITY.

I'M SO THANKFUL I KNEW THE

LORD BEFORE I WON THAT.

I WAS A RELATIVELY NEW

CHRISTIAN, AND IT KIND OF

PUT IT ALL IN A DIFFERENT

PERSPECTIVE HAD IT WOULD

HAVE BEEN HAD I BEEN

YOUNGER.

BUT IT IS TREMENDOUS

PRESSURE.

AND EVERYBODY WANTS TO MEET

MISS AMERICA.

THEY DON'T REALLY KNOW YOU.

YOU NEED TO REALIZE IN THE

MIDDLE OF THAT, THAT THAT

CROWN CAME VERY QUICKLY, AND

VERY QUICKLY IT WILL LEAVE.

AND HER QUESTION IS A

GENUINE ONE, ESPECIALLY ON

THE HEELS OF RACHEL'S

INTERVIEW, WHO AM I APART

FROM THIS?

Gordon: DID YOU FEEL

PRESSURED TO PROJECT AN

IMAGE AS OPPOSED TO BEING

THE REALTO REAL TERRY?

Terry: NOT SO MUCH IN

DEEP WAYS.

BUT PEOPLE EXPECTED YOU TO

GET OFF THE PLANE WEARING A

CROWN AND HAVING A DOZEN

FRESH FLOWERS.

AND WHEN YOU CAME OFF IN A

PANT SUIT, THEY WERE A

LITTLE DISAPPOINTED.

SO YOU HAD TO MEASURE UP TO

A DIFFERENT STANDARD.

UNLIKE LAUREN, I DIDN'T WANT

THE CROWN FOR ANOTHER YEAR.

I MEAN, I LOVED IT, BUT I

WAS READY TO TAKE THAT AND

MOVE ON.

SO IT'S ALL GOOD.

Gordon: I THANK GOD

I'VE NEVER WON A BEAUTY

CONTEST.

WE LEAVE YOU WITH THIS WORD

FROM PSALM 139: "I WILL

PRAISE YOU FOR I AM FEAR

FULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE.

MARVELOUS ARE YOUR WORKS,

AND THAT MY SOUL KNOWS VERY

WELL."

GOD BLESS YOU, WE'LL SEE YOU

AGAIN.

EMBED THIS VIDEO


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