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Bring It On-Line: Honoring Parents - January 3, 2017

What does the Bible say about taking care of your parents? Am I dishonoring her? My daughter has 5 children ranging in ages from 3 to 20. I've never met my youngest grandson, and we only live 7 miles away. Will God punish my daughter for not ... ... Read Transcript


We want to take some time to answer

the email questions you send in, so let's

Bring It On for the day.

This is Erin Pat, who says, "I'm a 30-year-old married woman

with three little girls ages six, four, and one.

My mother is single.

We had to let her move in with us after a hospitalization.

We've gotten her health back on track.

She helps with the kids, but every single thing

we try to do as a family, she wants to join.

There's no respect for the fact that I

need family time sometimes.

I really want her to move out into an independent living

community.

Am I wrong for wanting to do things

without her and for wanting her to move out and give me

and my family some space?

What does the Bible say about taking care of your parents?

Am I dishonoring her?

I just really need to find a solution that

works for all of us and honors God in the process."

Well, you know, the Bible says "for this cause shall

a man leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife

and the twain shall be one flesh."

People get older, and they leave home.

And then they form new family units.

The problem is your mother has-- does not

recognize the fact that you and your husband and your children

need your own deal.

Now, what used to happen in some of the older times,

you'd see a grandmother house or an old aunt house or wherever,

and they'd just build an extension on the house

and they'd have their own little living quarters.

Yeah.

Sometimes even a separate little house.

A little house, yeah.

Something like that would work.

But I don't think you're dishonoring your mother

to say-- and she ought to have enough sense

to know it's time to leave.

Daughter has grown up.

Daughter's got her own family.

And she needs to respect your need for space.

And the way you could do it, perhaps,

you've got to find a place, an assisted living place or maybe

that idea of building an extension on your house--

I don't know what kind of house you got,

but in the old countryside you'd see them.

You'd see additions to homes.

But there are lots of wonderful communities

for people--

Oh, sure.

--that, you know, 55 and over.

And so maybe do some research for her.

One of them I saw is like going on a luxury cruise.

I mean, the food was delicious.

The accommodations were tremendous.

All right, what else?

OK, this is a viewer who says "my oldest

daughter's in a May-December marriage.

Their relationship began when she was 16

and he was 32, married with two children.

She worked after school in his office.

Of course, this tore our family apart.

Several years later, we reconciled with our daughter

and moved closer to her.

Then in January, 2010, things changed

and she stopped taking my phone calls,

answering her door when I'd visit, et cetera.

My daughter has five children ranging in ages from 3 to 20.

I've never met my youngest grandson,

and we only live seven miles away.

Will God punish my daughter for not honoring her parents?"

I think so.

I think it's outrageous.

You know, those children, they need

to know their grandparents.

It gives them a sense of place, a sense of belonging.

And the fact that here's grand-daddy and here's

a grandmother and here's mama and daddy.

And it gives them a sense that I am part of something.

Otherwise they're just like a cut flower.

So she is denying her children one

of the great experiences of their lives

and the ability to say, I am part of an ongoing continue.

And my family goes back father, grandmother, grandfather,

and so forth.

And to deny those children that is outrageous.

Will God punish her?

Well, I think she's punishing herself.

Yeah.

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