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Becoming the Woman She Was Meant to Be

Desperate for her father's love, Venus needed an outlet for her anger. She began rapping, drinking, and taking on a masculine role, but she still lacked the love she craved, and prayed to be saved from her lifestyle. Read Transcript


NARRATOR: People today know Venus Burton

as a Christian rapper.

I'm free, I'm free, so a little

rapping to it, no more shackles, no more chains. (RAPPING)

No more shackles, no more chains.

NARRATOR: There was a time people knew her

by a different name.

Hey, what's up, y'all?

It's your girl, Booski Love, coming at you.

VENUS BURTON: They would call me Booski, Booski Love.

Now that was one of my rapping names.

[INAUDIBLE] Underground rap, gangster rap,

I was more of an outlaw.

It's like, well, you don't mess with me.

I won't mess with you kind of thing.

And so in my songs back then, there was a lot of pain

that I went through.

NARRATOR: Venus grew up in Southern California.

She lived with her brother Kenny and her single mom

Vicki, who worked several jobs.

They didn't see a lot of their mother or wayward father.

Well, I always wanted to be a daddy's girl.

And I thought that I was cheated.

Why can't I have that?

Why can't I have a father?

And so that caused me to rebel, and I got angry.

And those different emotions began to control my life.

NARRATOR: Venus was 13 when her mom gave her life to Christ

and started taking them to church.

At the same time, Venus also started rapping,

which helped to vent her anger.

I had to pour it out, or to empty myself to get rid of it.

So I would do it in the music to get that relief

or to get that satisfaction that I was yearning for.

NARRATOR: By 16, Venus was drinking often.

She also decided to hide her feminine side.

Because it shows a soft side of me.

It shows the emotions.

It showed things that I was going through, the hurt

and the pain that I was going through,

that I was dealing with.

NARRATOR: She started changing the way

she cut her hair and the clothes she wore.

She looked and acted more like a man with each passing day.

Because I want to be that aggressive one.

I wanted to be the man role.

I wanted to be the one that was in control.

I wanted to be the one to have the power.

NARRATOR: After two years, the transformation

was complete as Venus became attracted to women.

In this lifestyle, I was accepted, you know,

so I found acceptance.

I found that security.

NARRATOR: Venus continued as an underground rap

artist, her popularity growing each year.

In the meantime, she had numerous relationships

with women and all ended badly.

The loneliness, the betrayal of friends and people

that I thought that loved me so much or even

being in the relationship.

I was drinking so much that I would black out,

didn't know places that I was.

And I found myself in some really dark places.

NARRATOR: All this time, her mom, Vicki,

prayed continually for her daughter,

hoping she'd find a way to Christ.

There was times I would go and put on her shoes

and walk and pray in them.

You know, just maybe take the anointing oil,

go anoint her room, you know, and just believe God.

NARRATOR: At times, Venus also reached out to God.

There was something in me that I will always

pray to God, seeking God.

I know You're real, but I need You to show up.

I need You to show up now.

You know, I'm tired.

I'm tired of being who I was.

Didn't know how to get out, didn't know

if there was a way to get out.

TV REPORTER (ON VIDEOTAPE): Up to 5,000 birds

just fell from the sky.

NARRATOR: One afternoon while watching an alarming

story on the news, Venus thought the world was coming

to an end as well as her life.

Like half an hour later--

I remember I said, you know, God save me, save me

from this lifestyle.

I need you to take this away from me.

And as I pray to God, He instantly

took away the desire of wanting to sleep with a woman.

His love and His compassion for me, I just

felt so much lighter.

I felt free.

I mean, I felt the chains were broken off of my life.

NARRATOR: It took time, prayer, and God's healing,

but Venus embraced her identity as the woman

God created her to be.

In my process, He was unveiling, unpeeling me just

like an onion, you know, every layer, every hurt,

every pain that I was going to, every disappointment.

And they were just coming off one by one.

NARRATOR: Venus and her mom joined forces, and minister

to hurting people through their radio show.

In the basement, Real Talk with VLB.

I am your host.

VENUS BURTON: That emptiness, the void that I was missing,

Jesus, He fulfilled that, that void,

that emptiness that I was filling in my heart.

He filled it with His love, His love and His compassion for me.

And that was really the ultimate healing for me,

to have God Almighty as my Father.


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