Army Chaplain Darren Turner and his wife, Heather, discuss the new movie â€œIndivisible,â€ which tells their story of marriage struggles during deployment.
- Well, one moment DarrenTurner's mind wandered
to the dozens of men wounded and killed
while he was deployed in Iraq.
The next moment Darrenhad his kids begging him
to go to the park and play.
As an army chaplain, Darrenwas a strong anchor of faith
for his fellow soldiers, but he struggled
to do the same at home.
- [Reporter] Darren Turnerand his wife Heather
had no idea how the war in Iraq
would shake their rock-solidmarriage, to its core.
In 2007, Darren, a Regent University grad
spent 15 months as an Army chaplain,
encouraging servicemenand women in their faith.
But when he came homethings quickly fell apart.
- I began to snap at little things,
and it didn't matter ifshe was right or wrong,
that wasn't the point.
It was an opportunity for me
to let some of my angerand frustration out.
- I knew something deeper, supernatural,
that we could notmanufacture had to happen
or else this was gonna gonowhere, was gonna get worse.
- [Reporter] Darren and Heather'sstory hits the big screen
in the movie, Indivisible,playing in theaters
starting October 26th.
- And the movie's amazing.
Well, Darren and Heather Turner,
the real Darren and HeatherTurner are with us now,
and welcome to The 700 Club, guys.
- Thank you for having us.- Thanks for having us.
- Wow, it's so weird, because I just,
you know, saw the movie last night.
I got finished watching at midnight
and then they had the pictures
of the real family come on afterward.
And so now, here you are.
Darren, you had severaltours of duty over in Iraq.
The one depicted in themovie was your first tour--
- Correct.- Which was incredible.
Can you even tell us, whatwas that like for you?
- Ya, so I actually went to seminary here.
I was a Regent student, graduated 2006,
and then went on activeduty the beginning of 2007.
Deployed for 15 months,
3 months after my firstday on active duty.
So it was fast.
It was part of President Bush's surge,
if you recall that back in 2007 and 2008.
And so we went to Iraq for 15 months.
- And I remember in the movie,
it's like, "We're called to this."
You were gonna just take it on.
And you get over there and it was totally
not what you expected.
Or worse than you expected.
I'm not sure I expected,
I had no idea what to expect, honestly.
I knew we were gonna go intoa pretty hot combat zone
and it was--- And it was.
- [Darren] It was pretty wild, ya.
- And you ended upministering to some soldiers
who ended up losing their lives
and that really affected you.- It did.
- And, Heather, you'rehome, raising three kids.
And you guys are communicating a lot,
and at first everything seems fine
but then you start tonotice he's not sounding
like himself anymore.
What was going on with you?
- I think for me, I just wantedto be able to connect to him
in a way that I felt likehe was hear and I was heard.
But there's just practical issues.
Back then, during the deployments,
you did just get yourtwo minute phone call
and there's this long delay.
And so, we would get off the phone
feeling like we hadn't reallysaid anything to each other.
- [Wendy] Two minutes.
Oh, I didn't realize it's only,
that's tough, that's really tough.
- Before Skype, before smartphones they had call centers
at some of these deployed locations.
And you had a limited amount of time.
Well, at least you called.
Guys just text today.
But, so, when he got home after,
it was 15 months, right?- 15 months.
- He wasn't the same man, Heather.
How did that make you feel?
What was going on?
Neither of us were the same people.
You know, you change anywayover that period of time.
But having been in stressful situations
just compounded that problem.
And so, he came back and I,
the same thing, I didn'treally have an expectation.
I didn't know what to expect,
but I did expect that atleast we would come back
and be glad to see each other
and sort of reconnect in a way--
- [Wendy] But he was angry.
He was just angry and disconnected.
- And, Darren, why do you think
you were taking yourfrustrations out on Heather?
- That's the million dollar question.
As you mentioned, itwas a tough deployment.
I lost a lot of guys.
She was there with the family,
so I didn't fully appreciatewhat she had gone through
on that deployment, I only saw what I saw.
And vice versa.
You didn't fully appreciatewhat happened with us.
And so we came backfeeling almost competitive,
like we both had a betterstory than the other one
and that kinda fueledthat anger a little bit.
And the kids, they'recaught in the crossfires.
How are they coping during this time?
- Ya, Ellie, I remember,and we have pictures
where she actually pulledall over her eyelashes out.
And not consciously.
She would not know that she had done it,
but we have pictures where she literally
is missing all of her eyelashes.
And she would say if youasked her that she was fine,
but clearly there's a stress.
- [Wendy] And she was thedaughter who has the asthma.
- Right.- Yes.
- And that was depicted sobeautifully in the movie
and brings you to tears.
That little actress wasamazing, I loved her.
You two actually separatedfor a little while
after you got back.
You'd already beenseparated for 15 months,
and then you get separated.
Did that help or hurt?
- Well, that's, for us, it was God's,
that was God working in us.
We had looked to each other for answers
and neither of us had answers.
We were both empty,and so it took a season
of being in the desert,almost like Gomer and Hosea,
where I had to go faraway to really figure out
what was going on in me,
and so that I could come back to Heather
and offer her something insteadof trying to take something.
- And, Darren, what was the turning point?
- So, one afternoon,
I took the kids to meet Heather
and that was the first time inlike a public setting where,
we were separated, and sothat was the first time
I had to like release the kids.
I stayed back and they ran to mom
and then I turned aroundand got in the car and left.
And so just the weight, thegravity of that situation
finally slapped me in the face
and woke me up, so to speak.
And from there, I was readyto fight for my family.
And that's when, I had to getout of the Army to do that.
The Army wanted me to stay in
but I knew that I needed timeand space outside of that
if I was gonna have a fighting chance
to win my wife's heart back and the kids.
- And, Heather, how did youlearn to trust Darren again?
Because he had completely changed
and, I guess what you didn't realize
was that he was feeling guilty
for not being able to save the men,
at least that's what'sdepicted in the movie.
- [Darren] Right.
- [Wendy] But, how did youlearn to trust him again?
- I think for me it was less
about learning how to trust Darren
and more about learninghow to trust the Lord
in difficult situations.
And so for me, it was more of
the Lord really just kindof revealing His will to me
for marriage and thatis He's for marriage,
how can we undo whatGod has put into plan.
And so, for me it wasjust an obedient choice
to follow what the Lord's will was
and trust that God was going to
keep me in his will and bless my children
out of an obedientdecision to stay married.
And eventually my emotionscaught up to that.
But it did take some time.
- So many military familiesgo through divorce.
Now you counsel military families.
What's the number onething that you tell them
when they're in the situationthat you guys were in?
- Ya, and my counsel to them
is that I don't understandevery couple's situation.
They're so drastically different.
- [Wendy] Sure.
- But the common denominatoris one or both want out.
And so, just one more day, one more day.
Let's keep talking about this.
Let's create some spacefor God to break your heart
for your family, instead of
you chasing after other things
and deciding that thisis the best thing to do
is leave your family.
It's not.- It's not.
- It's not.- It's not.
Well, your story is nowheaded to the big screen.
It's called Indivisible.
It is a powerful movie.
I loved it.
I did cry a few times.(Darren and Heather laughing)
And I love that, well,I love so much about it.
We don't have time to talktoo much about the movie,
but it comes out when?
- October 26th, just in a couple of weeks.
At theaters across the country?
- Absolutely.- Okay.
- Go to indivisiblemovie.com
and you can type in your zip code
and it'll pop up theclosest theaters to you.
- I really think it's a right now movie
and it's a great movie for military
and anybody, any--- Anybody.
- Anyone to see.
Thanks for sharing your storywith us and with the world.
For more informationyou can go to cbn.com.
Again, Darren, Heather, thanks.
God bless you guys.
- Thanks for having us.- Appreciate it.