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Bring It On-Line: Communication and Marriage

I keep hearing that communication is one of the keys to a great marriage. How should a wife communicate with a husband who is reserved, quiet and hard to talk to? How does one truly know when she is standing on faith? I know that God is able ... ... Read Transcript


TERRY: WE HAVE LOTS OF GOOD

E-MAIL QUESTIONS YOU SENT IN FOR

OUR BRING IT ON SEGMENT.

PAT, LET'S START WITH BECKY.

I KEEP HEARING COMMUNICATION IS

THE KEY TO A GREAT MARRIAGE.

HOW SHOULD A WIFE COMMUNICATE

WITH A HUSBAND RESERVED, QUIET

AND HARD TO TALK TO.

SURELY THIS ISN'T WHAT GOD HAD

IN

MIND WHEN HE

CREATED

A

WOMAN

FOR

A MAN.

PAT: MANY MEN

WORK

HARD AND

SHOW LOV

E BY

PROVIDING A

HOME,

PROVIDING FOOD, BY PROVIDING

INSURANCE, PROVIDING ALL THE

THINGS, EDUCATION FOR KIDS AND

THINGS LIKE THIS.

WHAT THEY WANT IS TO BE

APPRECIATED.

BUT I WANT TO TELL YOU A STORY.

I HAD HEART SURGERY, NO I I HAVE

HAD A NUMBER OF SURGERIES.

[LAUGHTER].

THEY TOOK MY PROSTATE.

TERRY: THEY LEFT YOUR HEART.

[LAUGHTER].

PAT: TOOK OUT THE PROSTATE,

TOOK OUT THE

CANCER.

WHEN I WAS RECOVERING

, MY HEART

STARTED GOING CRAZY, BEATING 160

BEATS A

MINUTE.

IT WAS WILD.

MY WIFE

CAME INTO

THE ROOM, TOOK

MY HAND, JUST TOOK MY HAND, JUST

LIKE THIS.

WITHIN TWO MINUTES, MY HEART

WENT DOWN TO NORMAL.

IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE.

THIS TOUCH.

I THINK FOR COUPLES, YOU KNOW,

HOLD HANDS.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO HAVE SEX OR

SOMETHING.

IF YOU WANT TO BY ALL MEANS,

HAVE AT IT.

THAT IS NOT THE ANSWER.

I THINK, YOU KNOW, JUST SITTING

QUIETLY IN THE PRESENCE OF

SOMEBODY YOU LOVE HAS A GREAT

DEAL OF IMPACT.

WOMEN ARE VERY LOQUACIOUS, THEY

LIKE TO TALK, A LOT OF MEN

AREN'T VERBAL.

THEY EXPRESS BY WHAT THEY DO.

TERRY: WHAT YOU SAID IS SO

SIGNIFICANT, SOME MEN SHOW THEIR

LOVE THIS WAY AND THAT WAY.

THERE IS A BOOK "THE LOVE

LANGUAGE BOOK."

IT IS GREAT.

SOMETIMES YOU CAN BE DOING

SOMETHING YOU THINK IS GIVING,

SHE DOESN'T SEE IT THAT WAY.

SHE HAS ANOTHER NEED.

IT REALLY IS HELPFUL.

THAT IS A GOOD BOOK.

PAT: MY QUESTION TO MY WIFE

WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO DO?

I COULD HAVE A HORRIBLE MEAL, IF

SHE HAS A GOOD MEAL, THAT IS ALL

THAT MATTERS.

TERRY: THIS IS JAMES, I LOVE

MY WIFE SO MUCH.

WE JUST HAD TWINS, WOW.

OUR ENTIRE LIFE HAS BEEN FLIPPED

UPSIDE DOWN.

MARRIAGE WE ONCE KNEW IS NOW

DIAPER CHANGES -- HOW DO WE KEEP

THE SPARK ALIVE WHEN WE DON'T

HAVE TIME FOR ONE ANOTHER?

PAT: I TELL YOU THERE IS A

JOY THAT COMES ABOUT THROUGH A

MUTUAL ENTERPRISE, TWO OF YOU

ARE

GETTING

TOGETHER IN

THIS

ENTERPRISE AND IT IS CALLED

RAISING CHILDREN.

IF YOU SHARE

TOGETHER, THE WIFE

SHOULD NOT PULL AWAY, YOU DON'T

KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT BABIES, GET

OUT OF HERE, NO.

THE HUSBAND SHOULDN'T SAY I

DON'T WANT TO FOOL WITH THOSE

KIDS I HAVE TO GO TO WORK.

THAT WILL DEEPEN YOUR MARRIAGE

AND LOVE LIKE NOTHING YOU CAN

BELIEVE.

YEARS AFTER MY KIDS HAVE GROWN

UP, I MISS HAVING ALL THOSE

LITTLE CHILDREN.

TERRY: THE KEY IS WE JUST

HAD TWINS.

YOU KNOW, IT GETS BETTER.

PAT: TWINS IS TOUGH.

TERRY: ANY BABY IS LIFE

CHANGING.

PAT: YOU ARE SUPPORTING YOUR

WIFE IN THIS IF YOU ARE A

HUSBAND.

YOU ARE ALL IN THERE TOGETHER.

TWO OF YOU PLANNING FOR YOUR

CHILDREN, SOMETHING ABOUT

WATCHING THEM GROW UP IT IS

WONDERFUL TO DRAW YOU TOGETHER.

TERRY: CAN I ASK YOU

SOMETHING, I REMEMBER WHEN ANDY

AND I HAD OUR FIRST CHILD.

I WAS ALL CONSUMED IN THE

MATERNAL CARING.

HE WAS AFRAID, I THINK.

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE

RELATIONSHIP WE HAD.

THIS LITTLE SPRITE HAS COME INTO

THE MIDDLE OF IT?

PAT: I DIDN'T.

FOR SOME UNKNOWN REASON.

YOU KNOW, A LOT OF TIMES OKAY,

THE KID IS CRYING, HONEY.

TERRY: NO WONDER HE DIDN'T

FEEL INTENTION.

PAT: I WASHED DIRTY DIAPERS

AND CHANGED.

YOU SHARE TOGETHER, OF COURSE

THE WIFE TAKES ON THE LARGEST

POSSIBILITY.

THEY HAVE MATERNAL CARE.

TERRY: IT IS TRUE.

PAT: I DIDN'T FEEL IT BROKE

OUR RELATIONSHIP.

TERRY:

HOW

DOES

ONE TRULY

KNOW WHEN SHE WAS STANDING ON

FAITH.

I AM A CHRISTIAN, YET I FEEL I

FALL SHORT WHEN IT COMES TO

FAITH.

I SOMETIMES HAVE DOUBT AND FEAR

SO STRONG IT MAKES ME PUT ASIDE

FAITH.

HOW DO I DEAL WITH THIS AND KEEP

MY FAITH ALIVE AND STRONG?

PAT: FAITH COMES BY HEARING

AND HEARING BY THE WORD OF GOD.

YOU NEED TO SPEND TIME IN THE

BIBLE INSTEAD OF FOCUSSING ON

WHAT YOU DO OR DON'T.

OF COURSE YOU ARE FAILING.

OF COURSE YOU ARE GOING TO FAIL,

WE ALL FAIL.

WHAT WE NEED TO DO IS READ THE

WORD THAT SAYS IN GOD'S SIGHT WE

ARE PRECIOUS AND SEE THE

PROMISES OF GOD.

I WAS READING IN 1 JOHN, NOW WE

ARE SONS OF GOD.

IT DOES NOT APPEAR WHAT WE SHALL

BE.

WHEN HE APPEARS WE WILL BE LIKE

HIM.

YOU READ THAT, ALL OF A SUDDEN,

THIS IS THE FUTURE.

YOU NEED TO BE ABSORBED AND HAVE

YOUR MIND THINKING INSTEAD OF

THIS I DIDN'T DO THIS RIGHT.

I DIDN'T DO THAT RIGHT, I AM

FAILED HERE.

WE ALL FAILED, GET OVER IT.

LET'S GET ON WITH PRAISING GOD.

TERRY: THIS IS SUSAN, I HAVE

BEEN TRYING TO GET A JOB A LONG

TIME NOW.

I OFTEN HEAR THE JOB IS GOING TO

SOMEONE ELSE FOR WHATEVER

REASON.

I HAVE GROWN VERY DISCOURAGED

AND FRUSTRATED.

WHAT DO I NEED TO DO DIFFERENTLY

SO I CAN GET A JOB?

PAT: DID YOU HEAR WHAT YOU

SAID?

I WANT A JOB.

I FAILED AT A JOB.

I WANT A JOB FOR ME.

NO.

LET ME SUGGEST YOU DO THIS.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

WHAT IS A THING INSIDE OF YOU

MORE FUN THAN ANYTHING?

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

TAILER WHAT YOU WANT TO DO TO

HELP THIS ORGANIZATION YOU WANT

TO WORK WITH.

YOU NEED TO FIND OUT ABOUT THIS

ORGANIZATION, WHAT IS THEIR

NEED, WHAT ARE THEIR DESIRES,

WHAT ARE THEIR FAILINGS AND HOW

CAN YOU STRENGTHEN THEM.

IF YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE SEC,

LEARN ABOUT IT, ARE THEY GOING

TO HAVE AN IPO.

HAVE THEY HAD ONE, STOCK UP

OR

DOWN?

TERRY: THAT WOULD CHANGE

YOUR JOB INTERVIEW.

PAT: IT REALLY WOULD.

I SAW YOUR PE DOWN TO 15 SHOULD

BE 20.

YOU ARE NOT PAYING DIVIDENDS.

I KNOW CARL ICON IS COMING AFTER

YOU.

ALL THE SUDDEN THEY SAY WOW, YOU

CAN HELP US.

TERRY: YES.

PAT: I AM LOOKING FOR A JOB.

NO.

YOU HAVE THE WRONG ATTITUDE.

TERRY: THANK YOU FOR YOUR

QUESTIONS.

EMBED THIS VIDEO

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